


The Return

by BethBoca



Series: Little Pattillo and Vagabond [2]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-12
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-09-07 13:52:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 34,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8803351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BethBoca/pseuds/BethBoca
Summary: Diane and Ryan are together again, but this time they don't plan to let anything stop them from being together. So when other crews and people of their past try pulling them apart can they keep it together?





	1. One

Five years of prison felt like nothing compared to what it could have been. Thanks to Lester and a few others, I got the criminal-justice hook-up and cut my sentence from life to five years. Five. Fucking. Years. I practically kissed the feet of all the bosses. Thankfully Los Santos is fucked up entirely and is full of crooked law enforcements. Now, as I stood in front of the white house that I once occupied, I noticed how much had changed in Los Santos since I had been locked away. New devices and electronics, new cars, new construction... Even new crews that have rose to the top with the Fake AH. I didn't allow any of my signers for my release inform the crew of my return. I wanted to find them on my own. It seemed much more cliché and meaningful, but I wanted it so god dammit I was gonna do it that way. I slowly walked to the house and placed my key into the lock. I thought they would have changed the lock by now, but nope. The key slid right in and turned easily. I pushed the door open and immediately frowned. This place didn't even look like it was touched. My candy wrappers from the day I left still littered the coffee table. Blankets folded on the lounge chair in the corner were still neatly lined on the edges. All the lights were off since no one paid the utility bills I assume. My car was impounded and bought back from Lester so it should arrive here tomorrow morning. It was cold and the counters were layered with dust as I walked around the dark kitchen. I grabbed my phone from my carry-out bag and went to my charger, which was still plugged in. I removed it before walking out of the tense-feeling house. Around the corner was a bar and I gladly walked there just to borrow an outlet on it's wall. I stood there by my phone and waited for the device to turn on. Thankfully my phone was hard to hack and I didn't reveal anything to the cops. As soon as it gave me a signal I flicked on the bars to the plan I had with the crew that Franklin had hooked us all up with and controlled my signal bars. I immediately began to dial all the old numbers of the crew. Ryan first. Then Jack. Then Michael, Gavin, and Geoff. None answered. On my last hope, I called Jeremy. Instead of an annoying dial tone and a machine voice to tell me the number was disconnected, I received a female voice.

"Hello?" She asked cautiously.

"Is this Kat?" I whisper; I had to take a guess. There's a small gasp.

"Oh my god it is you..." I furrow my eyebrows. "Do you want me to call Jeremy for you?" I shake my head quickly.

"No, no!" I say in a rush. "I actually want to surprise him." She doesn't hesitate to tell me their address and I found it alarming how quick she was to the punch. I thanked her nonetheless and unplugged my charger from the wall. I hail a taxi after a minute of looking for one outside the bar. I give the address to the driver and wait patiently. Thankfully they didn't live too far away. Jeremy had moved from an apartment and to an actual house with Kat. I found it great that he finally made the big move. He was too scared to out her to even be seen with her. I wait for the driver to pull away after his payment and tap on the door heavily. Abaddon- Kat I should say- opens the door and immediately pulls me inside.

"He's just gotten out of the shower. Just wait here and I'll call him downstairs." I nod and listen to her call for Jeremy. A few moments pass before Jeremy is downstairs in jeans with a towel in his hands. "Sweetheart, there's someone here for you." He looked suspiciously at Kat until I walked forwards from the dimly lit hallway to reveal myself. Jeremy looks at me and the towel falls from his hands. I could see him catch his breath and swallow thickly before looking me up and down slightly.

"Diane..." He whispers. When he realizes he was staring and making it awkward, he snaps from his trance and walks to me, wrapping me into a tight hug. I didn't care that he was shirtless. He was like a brother to me and I couldn't be happier to see him. When he pulls back, he runs a hand through his fading purple hair. "Do the others know?" I shake my head.

"I got lucky Kat answered. The others disconnected their old numbers." I tell him. He nods.

"I kept mine open for the incase..." He looks at me for a moment as if in awe. I would do the same thing if I wasn't so focused on catching up with the years I've missed. "That phone hasn't rang since you were caught." Hearing that made my heart sink to my stomach.

"Is the crew still together?" I ask out of worry for his tone of voice. He nods and realizes why I asked.

"They changed their numbers as soon as you left. I kept it because I knew your phone was encrypted. They didn't want to risk it. Do you want to go see them? We have to meet up at the Christpunchers' hide-out-"

"The what?"

"Oh, it's our bike gang. You know, our other persona." I laugh lightly and nod.

"Yeah, I get it." I bite my cheek. "When are you meeting up?" He glances at the clock by the kitchen wall.

"In about an hour." He replies. "If you want you can stay here and we can catch up a bit until then." I nod my head and take la seat while he goes to the closet down the hall and pulls out a shirt. He tugs on the clothing before taking a seat with me.

-

Jeremy and I talked for the full hour before we headed towards the building. I was fidgeting in my seat with my heart racing as Jeremy drove closer to the warehouse.

"Relax, LP." God I haven't heard that name in so long... "They will react like I did most likely." I nod and take a deep breath. The car comes to a stop but neither of us move to exit the vehicle.

"It's been five years, J." I say, looking at the blue door next to the garage door. "What if they don't react the same?" He pauses and sighs before shutting off the car completely.

"Have you been by the house?" I nod. "Then you've noticed we haven't touched it since that day. You made a big impact on all of us. We tried to bust you out but every time we neared the prison we were caught or plans didn't go through. We almost lost Gavin twice and Geoff once. We called it quits and tried to face the truth." I sat in silence as he spoke. "You're family. Always have been and always will be. Remember the last words you said to us? We all quote them sometimes to keep us going in your honor, Diane. Ryan likes to ignore the moving on part." I huff and shake my head.

"He never listened to me anyways." I smile at the end and Jeremy laughs lightly.

"Come on, Kid. Let's go." I take one solid deep breath and follow Jeremy out of the car and to the door. Jeremy pulls open the door and glances around before giving me the okay to follow him. I walk in to the garage and immediately take in my surroundings. Six bikes- all styled differently. I instantly noticed which one was Jeremy's.

"Really?" I whisper. "You 'Rimmy-Tim'ed it?" He shrugs and smiles at me over his shoulder. He doesn't say a word before we continue to the stairs. I'm careful to follow in his steps to sound like only one person is coming up the stairs. There is some laughter and quiet rock music playing before a cheer and a thudding sound. Darts. Jeremy leads me to the top and everyone turns to look at him. They were going to greet them until their eyes landed on me. Silence. The music is the only noise to play. Geoff, Michael, and Jack are the immediate ones to acknowledge me. Next was Gavin and last was Ryan. Jeremy was right: they all acted out like Jeremy did. Jack and Geoff engulfed me in hugs to where I nearly couldn't breathe. I gladly accepted their heartwarming motions as Gavin took me in his arms and spun me.

"I can't believe you're back!" I missed the British accent after hearing so many plain American ones in the prison yard. Michael didn't hug me but instead pulled out a photo from his jacket pocket.

"I was gonna send it out tomorrow. Luckily I don't." I take the film paper and stare at the face of a toddler. I missed it. I missed his child growing up... I sniffled as tears came to my eyes and hugged him tightly around the neck.

"Thank you..." I whispered. Ryan still stood there just staring at me. I returned the look and I wasn't sure how to feel about it. I watched his hardened expression falter to a saddened and relieved one before the man wrapped me into a hug tighter than Geoff's and Jack's. I squeezed him just as tight as I leaped up and he held me close. I wept lightly into the nook of his neck and felt his nails digging into my sides. "I've missed you so fucking much." I mutter into his collar. He pulls back and sets me on my feet again, wiping at his eyes.

"I've missed you, too." He whispers.

"Alright, everyone look away so these two can kiss." Geoff says with slight annoyance but still a lot of happiness. The others do as told so Ryan could easily grab my and press his lips on mine. The sensation of him holding me close and proving to me that he hasn't moved on was a feeling I wasn't expecting to experience. I honestly thought Ryan would have moved on by now. He allowed me to melt into him before pulling back and resting a soft kiss on my cheek. I smile lightly at him.

"You guys are safe." Ryan says with a smirk. His eyes do not leave mine as I am surrounded by the crew again. Questions fly from all directions and I chuckle, putting my hands out to stop them.

"Guys..." I say warningly. They apologize immediately. "I'll tell you guys everything but for now I want to relax with y'all. I don't care If that means a mission or drinking beers until sun-up." Geoff grabs me and kisses the top of my head quickly.

"Glad to have you back, LP." I chuckle and nod.

"It's fucking great to be back." I shiver from the chill that enters the upstairs. "So is there any real booze to drink or food I can eat?" The men begin fumbling over each other to get me something to eat/drink. I didn't mean for them to suddenly turn into slaves. I guess they were just as excited to see me as I was them. I accept the tequila from Michael and tuna sandwich from Jack. I felt their eyes on me as I took a swig and a bite. "You guys..." I say quietly. Geoff clears his throat and nods.

"Right. Okay, let's leave her alone." Geoff begins to shoo away the crowd and himself but Ryan doesn't listen. Instead he takes a seat beside me and watches me eat my sandwich. I smirk over at him.

"Can I help you?" He smiles small. It was just enough to tug at the corners of his mouth.

"You're even more beautiful now than five years ago." I nearly choked on my food. I glanced at him with heat clouding my skin.

"T-thank you, James." He chuckles.

"I've missed you blushing." I slapped his arm lightly.

"Ryan, stop trying to flatter me."

"Is it working?"

"Yes."

"Then I won't stop." I roll my eyes at him and can't keep my face from getting hotter. "You're turning so red it's adorable."

"Haywood!" Jack yells. We turn to him and he's smirking even with his tone of voice. "Stop flirting and get ready. We got shit to do." He looks to me. "I'm really glad you're back, D, but you gotta focus." I nod and stand from the table with Ryan, walking to the crew.

"We got two jobs to do. One is to destroy the ammo crates for shipment down in Sandy Shores. Another is to take out the Mc vans. Which are we gonna go for?" Geoff questions. Jeremy grabs a weapon I don't recognize from the wall of guns.

"With these launchers we can get those vans easily." He comments.

"Launcher?" I ask.

"Yep. Grenade launcher. Came out last year." Michael informs me. I nod my head and inspect the weapon. The metal quality has improved over the years I've been gone.

"So vans first and then fuck around with the crates?" We all nod. "Alright. So teams or just wing it?"

"How many vans?" Michael requests.

"Five."

"I think teams are good. Three members are in a van, right?" Geoff nods. "Then I say Team Nice Dynamite takes one, Team OG on another, Ryan on his own, because he can handle it obviously, and then Team-" Michael pauses and looks at Jeremy and me. "What is your team name?"

"Team T.O.P." I say quickly. Jeremy smiles wide at me and nods.

"Alright. So you guys take one. That leaves one van. Whatever team finishes first will take the last one. Let's make it a competition." I roll my eyes.

"Of course Mogar wants it to be a comp." I remark. He smirks and nods.

"It's gotta be, LP!" I laugh lightly with the men and we quickly begin to ready ourselves.

"Gonna be a good day!" Gavin yells loudly as we bound down the staircase to their bikes. "D is back, we got a big money shipment in, and we are gonna flub up the other bike gang!" Gavin climbs onto the back of Michael's bike as Michael revs it to life. Ryan goes to his own skull caged motorcycle and Geoff and Jack go to their own. I guess by the looks of Gavin's antenna covered bike it wasn't as fast as Michael's. Jeremy goes to his orange and purple bike, me following him to swing over the back seat. We rode out and towards Sandy Shores and before long, Jeremy and I ran into our van. The doors opened in the back after Jeremy pistoled at the armored van. I fired a grenade inside and killed everyone in it before destroying the van itself with another shot from the launcher. I press on my ear and inform the others we were going after the other van. I heard something being muffled over an explosion before the words were repeated.

"They have back-up!" It was Ryan. Was he able to handle the back-up they retrieved? I knew he was fine with just the van but not so much with the extra help. I tap on Jeremy's shoulder. He nods immediately.

"On our way." I shout to the earpiece. We round the corner and zip past Geoff and Jack firing their weapons to murder the last man in the back of the van. The driver was still alive and furious. We kept driving. Not long after they are out of sight I hear a deep explosion. Ryan is not too far ahead. I can see him trying his hardest to dodge the gunfire from both ends of him. I raise my machine gun and clack it towards the two men on bikes that were closing in on him. I shot one down while Jeremy dodged the ammo now firing towards us instead of Ryan. The other biker spun around and fired off ferociously until I shot his hand to make him drop his gun. Jeremy grabbed a crowbar the was hooked onto the side of the bike and raised it, slamming it like a bat against the man's face as we sped past him. He flips off the bike and onto the hard pavement before we finally catch up to Ryan. By the looks of it and the scattered bikes that were laying on the street before we saw him, Ryan had more than just two extras on his trail. Something was different about him. He seemed breathless yet he was riding a bike. I knew that look; I've made it myself. "He's been shot!" I tell Jeremy frantically. Jeremy nods once and moves closer to Ryan's bike. I grab his pistol when I see him not firing it and shoot two men from the back of the van. They both tumble out of the vehicle before I fire off the launcher. It breaks apart to notify me it has been destroyed. Jeremy and Ryan pull their bikes to a stop. Before it even completely slows I dive off the bike and grab Ryan.

"D-"

"Don't talk. Where is it?" I demand. He sighs and removes his hand from his stomach. It was dead center. I groan and shake my head. "Caleb can't fix this. We need a real hospital." Ryan nods.

"Okay..." He was finding it difficult to breathe and I didn't blame him for having a few tears escape his eyes. I snap my finger to my earpiece.

"Ryan is shot. I'm gonna take him to a hospital. It's bad. Finish the job and kill all those MC fuckers!" Even in pain Ryan can't help but smirk at me. I pull him onto his bike once more but this time clinging to me from the back. I wasn't sure how to drive a motorcycle but god damn did my instincts kick in. I went with the flow immediately and kicked the bike to start again. I speed off while switching gears with my foot and handle. Ryan hangs tightly to my waist. "Hang in there, babe..."


	2. Two

Two days. Two long fucking days of no sleep and barely any food or liquids just watching Ryan's unconscious body lay in this god dammed hospital bed. The monitor beeped continuously while I stared at Ryan's resting face. Geoff stood in the room with me and quietly watched with every time I squeezed his hand when he moved or the monitor beeped wrong.

"Diane-" My eyes shot up to Geoff's coldly and he sighed heavily. "You gotta know I'm right."

"He's gonna wake up Geoff." I swear. "If you honestly think he'd give up that easily then you were never his friend." The room falls silent again while Geoff shakes his head.

"Why are you such a stubborn asshole?" He whispers. "Your boyfriend is here dying and you can't accept it. Why? You're just making him look like he's going to be weak if he dies."

"He's not going to die!" I shout, standing from my seat and slamming my hand atop the bar on the side of the bed. Geoff and I stare hard at each other until Jack opens the door and looks to the both of us. He comes to the foot of the bed and stares at each of us with his arms crossed.

"What the fuck are you two arguing about now?" He questions. Geoff and I stay quiet. "Of course... Geoff, go outside while I talk to her." He is hesitant, but Geoff leaves. I slowly take my seat again. I never let go of Ryan's hand during the incident. "Diane, go home."

"Jack-" I scoffed out. "-I am not leaving until he wakes the fuck up."

"You go home and you get some rest goddammit because I know that if it was you in that bed you'd want him to do the same." I shut my mouth tightly. "Now go home. Get some sleep. Eat. Relax if you can. Then come back in the morning."

"But if he wakes up-"

"We will call you." I switch my eyes back and forth between Ryan and Jack. I finally let my hand slip from Ryan's. My skin is cold from the sudden loss of touch. "Goodnight, D." Jack kisses my head before I completely leave the room. I don't make eye contact with any of the men that I pass in the hallway. Gavin, Jeremy, and Michael all sat on the floor while Geoff and I'm guessing Jack took the two chairs on the wall. I make it outside and almost forget it was night and not on the same day Ryan came into the hospital. I called up the cab number I had saved into my phone and patiently waited for the cabbie to arrive. I could see my breath in the cold air and watched different lights pass by the hospital's lot. Finally a cab stopped and called for me. I slipped into the back and gave the driver my street. I rested my head against the window and yawned. The lights flashed by and I knew as soon as I got home my body was going to crash; Both physically and emotionally. I felt the car slow to a stop and grabbed my wallet. I pulled the desired cash from the leather pouch and exited the vehicle. I walked down the street and unlocked my door before making it inside. I kicked off my shoes and threw my bag to the couch. My jacket was shimmied off between the living room and my bedroom. I flicked on the light switch before undressing and changing into my pajamas. I walked to the bedroom door and shut it, turning off the light and flopping onto my mattress after plugging in my phone to the charger. My eyes shut immediately.

-

In the morning I didn't hesitate to rush everything I did. Eating, showering, texting even. I was already walking through the hospital doors towards Ryan's room. As I made my way down the hall, though, I noticed something different about the crew. They were off and not in a good way.

"Guys?" I asked, causing them to turn to face me. "What's up?" Immediately my mind went to Ryan's health. "No."

"No!" Jack says quickly. "He's fine. Better than yesterday, actually."

"Then what's the problem?" I ask with slight relief.

"I don't think you should see him quite yet."

"And why not?" I cross my arms, eyeing him. "If he's good then I have nothing to worry about."

"You got really clingy and it wasn't a good thing." Geoff explains. I roll my eyes and turn to him.

"Jack told me I could come back in the morning so I did." I mention. "Now let me see him before I barge in there myself." They don't reply so I push past them anyways. I turn around the corner of the room and see Ryan's feet to indicate he was turned slightly on his side. I smile at the small image and proceeded into the room. I stopped in my tracks when I noticed a woman around my age with brown long hair that was curled half-ways up. She had stunning blue eyes like Ryan's. She sniffled and looked at me with confusion.

"Who are you?" I immediately felt hostile towards her tone.

"I'm Diane, Jack's sister. Who are you?" My attitude surely wasn't going to help the problem that stood by Ryan's bed.

"I'm Ryan's wife, Kayla." I nearly cringed at the name just because I hated that name in general. I almost deafened at the spoken word of 'wife'.

"Wife?"

"Yes. We have been married for eight years." She comments matter-of-factly. "He disappeared after a year... I thought he was killed." She covers and mouth and touches Ryan's hand. I flinch with anger and swallow thickly. I bit my tongue to avoid saying something that was uncalled for. "How long have you and your brother known him?"

"My brother has known him for longer but I've known him for six years." She nods and clears her throat.

"I hope he comes back to Texas with me..."

"And why would he?" And there I got snapping again. She gives me a confused look.

"Because he must have amnesia of me or something to just leave like that. Why wouldn't he come back?"

"Because he left you for a reason in the first place!" I shout. I was ready to attack this woman when I felt arms on me and holds me, dragging me out. "Let me go!" I argue.

"Calm down." I hear Jeremy whisper. I shake my head. "Please, D. Calm down." I take a deep breath and finally relax enough to be released in the hallway while Geoff went in to talk to Kayla about me most likely.

"Why the fuck is she in there claiming to be his wife?" I ask, claws digging into my arms as I crossed them. My face was heated and I had angry tears in my eyes. I was ready to rip her pretty hair out.

"Because she technically is- well, _was_." I arch an eyebrow at Jeremy. "Okay, so before Ryan came into the crew him and Kayla were dating for a year and he supposedly married her for another one. Halfway through, Ryan changed and when Kayla pointed it out with disgust, he decided to leave. Kayla wasn't having it and so he left without telling her. But, he never sent any divorce papers or anything. She called up for a missing persons but nothing came through." I watch with high murder intent as Jeremy explains Kayla to me. "So she thought maybe he went out for air and hit his head really hard and got amnesia. Diane, you gotta listen to me when I say she's obsessed with Ryan at the moment. Having him back is the highlight of her life right now..."

"Well she isn't having him back, dammit!" I keep my voice lowered so precious in there doesn't hear me planning her death. I guess you can say I'm getting jealous...

"Think of it this way, D. If you really want her gone, tell her. Tell her everything you know about Ryan. Tell her about you: The other woman." Jeremy had a twisted idea and I was mad enough to go with it. So I did. I walked into the room with Geoff eyeing me cautiously.

"Kayla." I say formally. She stares at me. "I'm sorry for the way I acted. I just got jealous."

"And why is that?" Her voice was sour. I dug my nails into my palms at the sound of it.

"Because Ryan's my boyfriend." She scoffs and crosses her arms.

"Yeah, okay." She said sarcastically. I arch an eyebrow.

"The fuck, bitch? I apologize and tell you the truth and you give me sarcasm? Do you want your ass beat?"

"Diane!" Geoff scolds quickly. I glare at him and he returns the look. I roll my eyes.

"You should know that I'm the other woman and that's the fucking truth. Five years I've been with the asshole that is laying in the bed. You've been with him for two- count them- two years. I have the overall score and I know that you know exactly why he left." Geoff doesn't stop me as I inch closer. Maybe it's because he knows he can stop me if he stays between us. "Kayla, sweetheart, darling, babe... Every other nickname you can't stand me calling you, would you please get the fuck out of my boyfriend's hospital room? I'm sure your face isn't the first one he wants to see when he wakes up." I hear a hiss from outside the door along with Gavin and Michael chuckling loud enough for a close ear to hear. That boosted my confidence enough to smirk at her.

"Well, Diane, I'm sorry to tell you, but legally, Ryan here is still my husband." I glance down at her hands and immediately inspect the small diamond ring encasing the bottom of her left ring finger. My eyes shoot back up at her.

"Then where's the wedding band?" Geoff looks to Kayla now, expectant as well. She falters in her facial expression.

"I left it at home."

"Oh yeah? Then right now, I don't believe that he's your husband."

"Where's your proof!" She shouts.

"Where's yours?" I ask right back. She stutters for a moment and groans in anger.

"I'm leaving. I'll be back tonight. Good day, Geoff. Fuck you, Diane."

"Sorry, sweetie, Ryan is the only one who does that!" I shout after he while she disappears from the room. I look to Geoff who has a reddened face from either laughter or anger. Maybe both.

"If Ryan was awake I'm sure he'd be fucking proud of you, you sassy motherfucker." I smirk and shrug.

"It's just what I am." I look at Ryan and sigh. "What if he really is married, Geoff?" I whisper.

"Well..." He trails and looks at the man with me. "I honestly can't tell you what to do. That's up to the both of you. Kayla or not it's your relationship and your decision." I usually liked it when Geoff was right. This time I didn't. I don't like making decisions and I most definitely hate making one that involves exes and past problems. I take the seat I usually sit in when I visit and grab onto Ryan's left hand. There was no tan line from a wedding band. I mean, I'm sure Kayla was full of it. Jeremy said that they were supposedly married: Meaning Ryan most likely left before it was official. I stared at the sleeping man as he turned his head to look at me.

"Please don't be married..."

-

I jolted awake with a crick in my neck from the hospital bed I slept uncomfortably in. I rubbed my face with my hand while my other one was loosely hung in Ryan's. I tightened my grip on it and sighed, looking at the ground. I don't know how much longer I could keep this up. Three days... Maybe Geoff was right. He might not wake up. I cover my mouth and look at Ryan's hand. I ran my thumb over his knuckles and smiled lightly, tears coming to my eyes. If he doesn't wake up then I know that he at least hung on for three days. Three long and painful days before he finally gave up. I couldn't see him as weak because I wasn't selfish. I let the tears run down my cheeks and off my nose and hand. I sniffled slightly, admiring the different features of just Ryan's hand. His knuckles bulged with scars from the previous fights and battles he had in the past. My eyes traveled up his arm and I admired every scar, freckle, and hair along the way. I sniffled again as tears began to continuously flow down my face. I reached his shoulder which was partially bare from the movement of the robe from his skin. I saw his muscle lining and a bullet wound from six years back in the first month I knew him. I remember that Caleb didn't stitch it because Ryan was busy trying to fight off others from the crew... That was the first time I ever helped. I stabbed someone in the leg and it was the only thing I had done. Ryan just laughed and was panting and bleeding while congratulating me. I looked at his neck and jawbone. His jawline was perfectly arched but there was a slight extra skin the was under his chin. It was covered with stubble and it was perfect. I honestly think it was one of my favorite things besides his laugh... I hope I get to hear that magical sound again. His lips were curled up into a half smile and it was barely noticeable. It twitched into that position from time to time, giving me false hope every moment it did. His nose was cute and round, much like a button but thin on the top. It was a teardrop shape almost. finally I made it to his eyes. Those pristine blue orbs with hints of green and even yellow with the way the light shone on them- wait a minute. My eyes widened and I gasped, standing from my chair and immediately wrapping Ryan's neck and head into a hug. His laugh was hoarse and low, but I heard it.

"Good to see you, too." Tears flowed faster and I didn't let him go. Not even slightly.

"I thought you were going to give up..." I whisper, letting go finally. When he tries to speak I grab his water cup the nurse left him this morning and put it to his lips. He gladly drank it quickly and cleared his throat.

"That's better." He seemed like his stomach wasn't giving him much trouble right now, which was good. "I wasn't going to give up, Diane. I knew you'd be left here without me and I didn't like that." I smiled and kissed his forehead before sitting down.

"So um... I met Kayla yesterday." I say quietly. His eyes flick to me and I nod. He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "She hasn't come back with proof that you're married."

"That's because we aren't-"

"I knew it!"

"-Legally." I stare at him. He puts a hand out. "Now don't think I didn't lie to you because you never asked about my relationships in the past."

"Ryan!" I argue.

"Just listen to me- Kayla and I were married but it was never documented. It was a rushed thing. We were both being dumb and decided marriage was cool. When I realized my mistake, I left and didn't come back. She doesn't have paper proof that we are married so technically it isn't legal." He explains.

"So if she comes back what do we do?" I question quietly. He shrugs and grabs my hand.

"I guess kill her?" I knew he was joking, but I wasn't when I replied.

"Ryan, I've already tried to do it. Geoff won't let me."

"Oh my god, I was kidding but I love you." He says with a low laugh. I shrug and laugh lightly with him. "But seriously, we should probably just ignore her. If it comes down to it, I guess kill her." I smiled and nodded.

"I really could work with that idea." Ryan chuckles again and nods slightly.

"And I could too. There's a reason I left..." I smiled and rested my head against his hand.

"I'm really glad you're back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't use the real name of Ryan's wife out of respect.


	3. Three

Kayla came back and with Ryan awake, they cleared the air. Sort of...

"I told you!" Kayla shouts. "We are married. Why don't you understand that it isn't over for me?" Her voice was filled with pain.

"And I told you, Kay..." Ryan says with a soft voice. Half was because of his stomach and the other half for being the better person in the argument. "We aren't. We never truly were. We were pretty much just children playing house! We didn't have any idea what was happening."

"I did!" She cries. "I loved you so much and for you to just- just leave! I planned my life out with you."

"But I didn't, dammit!" His shouting made him wince. We all sat in silence in my house. Jack and Geoff sat on either side of me. Gavin and Michael shared the two-dated couch. Jeremy took a spot on the floor with his legs straightened and his fingers playing with the carpet between them. Ryan and Kayla sat behind us for only Team Nice Dynamite to see them arguing. I could hear the pain in both of their voices; Only, one was emotional and one was physical.

"Ryan, I still love you. I do. I always have and always will. What happened? What changed?"

"I did." He replies. "I became more criminally minded. I told you I didn't want you in that life and yet, you kept saying I would never turn. Look at me, Kay. I am on the FIB most wanted list... I never meant to hurt you the way I did. I wish I would have fixed it."

"Then why didn't you?" Kayla questions.

"Would it have changed anything?" There's a long silence. "Exactly..."

"Did you ever love me?"

"At a time, I believe I did. I think that's why I left. I loved you enough to want you to be safe forever. So I lost myself from you." I can hear Kayla sniffle. "I don't love you anymore. I haven't forgotten about you, but I don't think of you the same way I used to. I realized that when I moved on from you too quickly."

"To her?" There's slight venom in her voice and I can't help but roll my eyes. She was in my house, talking to my boyfriend, yet she has the nerve to disrespect me. There's a small line of silence again. "I see... Do you-" A pause. "Do you love her?"

"Yes." The answer was quick and it sent a shot of electricity through me. Jeremy looks at me and smirks, putting a hand half cupped at me.

"Gay!" He whisper-shouts. By the awkward look on his face I am guessing Ryan was glaring at him. I snickered at him and continued to listen to the deep conversation.

"I don't belong here, then. I-I'm sorry." She sounded embarrassed more than hurt. "I thought that maybe you were just confused and lost and didn't remember where you came from... Now I know that you found a new life and didn't want the one we- you had." She was putting all of this on herself when some of it was actually Ryan's doing more than hers. "If I would have just let you go-"

"-then things would not be as hard as they are now, but they would be painful." Ryan admits. "Kayla, I'm sorry. I'm going to have to ask you to leave and not come back." I glanced over my should and saw Ryan hugging Kayla lightly into his chest. It made jealousy flare in me but I quickly calmed it. Quiet air surrounded us in tension until the door to the house closed and Kayla was gone. I stood from the couch and turned to Ryan, seeing him clutching the table and a hard jaw set on his face.

"Are you okay?" Ryan shoots his eyes to me and then forwards again.

"Fine." He was obviously lying. I walked forwards and he sighed, looking away from me and standing off to the side more when I reached for him. My heart sank and I swallowed thickly.

"Okay." I whisper. I turn to the guys and clear my throat. "You guys should uh..." I trail and Geoff takes the hint quickly. He beckons the others out and I stop Jack, grabbing his arm. "Take Ryan." I close my eyes and bite my lip. "Please..." Ryan doesn't try to stop Jack from tugging him from my house and out the door. I watch his back and Jack as they exit the lot and I immediately go to my room, face tightening up and a ball forming in my throat. Ryan was lying. He still loved Kayla. He had to of. Why did he act that way if he didn't? He would have been relieved to have her gone and okay. No, he was hurting... I grabbed tightly to my pillow as I curled into a ball on my bed. I heard the storm picking up outside and rain smashing against my window. He said he loved me... But he lied. He still loves her. I'm sure he loves me too, but he can love both of us. That's where the pain and struggle would come in. I let my face wet the pillow in my tears, sniffling as I listen to the rain fall. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he was just annoyed with the situation or the pain in his stomach. No. I couldn't be wrong. That emotion he gave me and the expression he used- I cried heavier into the pillowcase. He still loved his ex and I couldn't change that; Not now at least. My phone went off and I saw it was Ryan calling: The very last person I want to talk to right now. I swiped the ignore button to activate and rested the phone beside me. I sniffled and pulled the blanket over me with the pillow covering my mouth and nose while I stared at my wall. I heard my phone vibrating again and again, but I didn't answer. When it got annoying, I turned off the device completely. I was not having it right now...

"Just leave me alone..." I cry out quietly. I make an ugly sobbing noise before stuffing my face into my pillow again.

-

I woke up with a massive headache and I couldn't open my eyes without squinting them or closing them once more. I tried to look at what time my phone displayed, but I forgot I turned it off. I patiently waited for it to turn back on and rubbed my face. It was gloomy outside but it wasn't early morning. Maybe eight or nine. The clouds were still full of water and just looming over the city. My phone lit up and displayed the time. It was nearly eight thirty. I sighed and flung off the covers before slipping on my house shoes. I yawned and cleaned under my eyes with my middle fingers before unlocking my door. My phone vibrated with missed call messages and texts I hadn't received. I ignored them and went to my bedroom door, unlocking it and opening it slowly. I tripped over something in front of my doorway and huffed in annoyance as I straightened up and look at what I tripped over. It was something I haven't seen in a while and I was pretty sure I had lost the first month I came: My knife that I brought from Texas. I bend down and pick up the object. I examine the bone handle and black metal blade that was embedded and tied into the jaw bone. The knife laid flat in my hand before I grabbed the handle to test it. The dulled black bear teeth dug into my palm and I felt memories flash into my mind. This was a gift from our dad. He found it amazing that I was absolutely fascinated with knives. He bought my this for my eighteenth birthday. I have used it for everything, even peeling apples and slicing them up. Where di this come from? I thought I lost it when I stabbed that guy in the leg. I went back into my room and grabbed my phone, inspecting the screen. All the messages were from Ryan.

Please answer my calls

You turned off your phone I guess?

I'm sorry, D... Just let me talk to you

I love you

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I don't love Kayla. I know that for sure now.

I left something outside your bedroom door... I kept it since you thought you lost it...

I stared at the knife in my hand. So Ryan took it that day? Why? Maybe he wanted to have it for himself... I locked my phone and stood from the bed. I went to the dresser and grabbed new clothes. I threw them on quickly before rushing out of the house to my car. I sped off towards Ryan's house. As soon as I pulled up, I see him leaning in the doorway, twirling a knife like he was just waiting for me. I step out of the car and slam the door closed behind me.

"You cocky son of a bitch!" I say immediately. He is about to speak but I just push him inside the house and shut the door behind us.

"I don't know what you mean."

"Liar."

"And?"

"Why did you have this?" I ask, holding up my knife.

"I like it." He replies with a small shrug. I roll my eyes. "Okay, fine! I kept it because at the time... I really wanted an excuse to get on your good side. I was gonna return the knife but I forgot about it and..." He trails. I stay quiet for quite some time. Ryan places the knife he twirled onto the counter in the kitchen and sighs. "So are you gonna talk to me or are you just here to stare?" I huff.

"Why did you lie?"

"I already told you-"

"Not about the knife, about Kayla." The room immediately fills with tension. "Ryan, I want to believe you when you say you don't love Kayla, but how can I?" He sighs and turns to me, fiddling with his fingers. It was odd and it made him look weak. I relaxed at the sight of him being weak around me.

"I realized it after I left last night. I knew I didn't love her but seeing her in pain and crying because of me- it brought back the time I was with her and it made everything hard. I then imagined you in her place. I hate hurting you. I hate seeing you cry because of me. When you kicked me out I couldn't stop thinking about it. Not Kayla, but you. Were you locked in your room crying all night? Did you hate me? Did you hurt yourself? Those questions came to mind every moment I thought about you and so I had to call you as many times as I did." Ryan walks forwards and looks me deep in the eye. "Diane, you know me so well. You should know that I won't just spill my guts out like this unless I truly and honestly mean it." I bite my lip and cross my arms.

"I know..."

"Then you believe me, don't you?" I avoid his eyes and look to my feet. "Look, I get it if you don't. I never told you about Kayla. I deserve a good punch for that but I don't deserve silence when I tell you something like this. You're always telling me to talk and now you are being a hypocrite." I hold my tongue to not argue because I know he's right. I sigh and give in.

"I believe you," I whisper. "I want to forget this, but it's hard. Do you know how it feels to see someone you love look in pain because they pushed away another lover?" He stays quiet. "I'm sure you don't want to know what that feels like..." He shakes his head. In the silence that was once tense I feel relaxation. "I love you." My voice was low and I know he heard it. He looks at me deeply and smiles ever so small.

"I love you, too." I lean up and kiss him gently. The longer I kept my lips on his the deeper the kiss seemed to lead on. Ryan's hands were soon in my hair, on my ass, and then undressing me. I followed his movements and returned the favor. Our bodies were heated and I could feel him radiating with heat. I admired the different scars that he gained while I was gone. There was a stab wound that I didn't see before and I touched it, seeing him watching me as his grip loosened. My eyes inspected his whole torso and I kissed the scars I was new to. He shivered every now and then at my touch.

"I've missed this..." I whisper. "Five years I've been without seeing you even slightly shirtless... The view is amazing." He chuckles lowly before leaning forwards to nibble on my ear lobe. I let him while I run my hands slowly down his arms and to his jeans. My fingers trace the hem in his process. I feel his fingers dig into my bare hips, causing me to smirk. "I've missed making you sensitive, too." He pulls back and places his forehead on mine.

"I've missed seeing you dominate me." His voice was low and husky. I wasn't sure if it was sexual, sensual, or both. Either way, I kissed him hard and let him take me towards the bedroom.

-

I slept over at Ryan's that night. His wounded stomach was completely healed now as if nothing happened. Of course, it was scabbed largely and it was sore, but it was healed. It was strange sleeping at someone else's house. Tonight, though, we were at an expensive house that was selling the property of an older woman who passed away. The crew sent in Ryan as a top millionaire, thanks to Kerry and Mica bragging, and me as his eye-candy. I grabbed the top knot of Ryan's tie and flattened it, making sure it was straight for the seventh time within the last five minutes. He grabbed my hands and sighed.

"If you don't want to do this just say so, Babe." He says with a smirk. I roll my eyes and shake my head.

"Just because I'm nervous doesn't mean I will fuck up the heist." I comment. He shrugs and grabs his knife from the table in front of us that held his knives and a tomahawk. Underneath was a rack that held pistols of all kinds.

"Well then I hope you're ready to kill if this goes topside." I nod my head quickly.

"I've done it before. I can do it again." My tone was confident and sure of itself but I could not shake the feeling each time I knew someone was meant to die at my hands. He collected the last of his weapons and pulls on his suit jacket. I grab the box with my dress in it, my make-up already completed. I wasn't used to the amount of powder covering my skin but it was part of the job: look unrecognizable. I stripped my clothing to only be in my bra and underwear before I caught Ryan staring at my body. I shivered from the loss of heat and smirked at him. "Stop staring," I comment. "Your eyes are gonna dry out." He laughs lowly and walks to me. I stop him with a hand stretched out. "No. Ryan, no!" His hands come to me and the coldness makes me squeak soon his arms are following the lines of my waist and then connecting behind my back. His fingernails dig into the cloth of my underwear as he grips tightly to my ass.

"I wish I could have you like this all the time." I laugh quietly and shake my head.

"That's not part of the mission. Come on, I gotta put on this thing. I haven't even seen it yet!" It was true. Ryan and Lindsay had picked out the designated outfits for tonight. Even though Lindsay had a kid now she still helped on the little objectives. I let him follow me to the bathroom door but I shut it in his face so I could change without his hands all over me. I laid out the dress on the clean bathroom floor and investigated it. It was magnificent if I do say so myself. It was black and pooled around the feet. The middle of the stomach and up was very thin and see through except for the leaf/flower pattern that trailed up the ribs, breasts, and down the right arm. The pattern didn't trail down the other arm, but it did surround the wrist part. I slipped into the dress, taking off my bra so that the dress could hopefully do its job by itself. Once on, I left it unzipped halfway so Ryan could finish it off, my arms apparently not flexible enough for that. I pulled on the pumps after removing my cat socks. My hair was already curled so I grabbed my branch/pearl hairpiece that pinned back part of my bangs. Once completed, I step out of the bathroom, Ryan fiddling with the cuffs of his jacket with the poison for a distraction in their hems. He immediately turns and grins largely.

"You look better than sexy..." He mutters whilst coming to me. "You look absolutely gorgeous." My face heated under the make-up and I spun to expose the zipper in the back. He doesn't need me to explain and zips me up completely. When I turn back around he attempts to kiss me roughly. I push off and point to my lipstick.

"Be careful!" I scold. "This was hard to perfect." He nods and attempts to kiss me again but this time slowly and gently. He pulls back with a small smile on his lips.

"Stunning..." He says, continuing to compliment me. I roll my eyes with a reddening face once more.

"Shush and let's go." He laughs at my flustered face and follows me out the door towards the limo. The driver's window rolls down to reveal Michael. He lets out a low whistle and pushes down his glasses to wink at me. "Why are you wearing shades, loser?" I ask, ignoring the cat call. "It's eight at night!"

"Because it's never too dark for class!" He argues. I laugh with Ryan and climb in the back. Inside waiting for us was Mica and Kerry, our "escorts". Mica was dressed in a very beautiful gown of green that was off of one shoulder. Her make-up looked professional and her hair was pushed to one side with a fake green rose in her hair. Kerry wore a suit that matched Mica's green color in tie and vest.

"You guys are making it obvious who you stand for," I comment, laughing lightly. Kerry and Mica pout.

"We like these colors!" Mica argues.

"So do the cops."

"Oh come on! So many people are going to be wearing these colors," Kerry inputs. "We won't even be noticeable. I nod in agreement and look at Ryan. His hair was slightly messed up in the front so I reached up to fix it. He gladly let me and I calmly replaced my hand. "Wow if I was to do that my hand would be removed from my arm."

"That's because I don't like you, Kerry." Ryan answers to his joke. Kerry puts a hand over his heart in mock hurt, which causes us all to laugh. We come to a stop in front of a mansion like building and that means it is our cue to exit the vehicle.

"This is it, guys..." Mica says with a deep exhale. "The heist." I nod and look at everyone.

"Let's do this." Everyone gives a moment of silence before leaving the limo with their pair. Kerry and Mica go before us and then we follow, my hand clinging tight to Ryan's.

"Babe, I get your nervous but I need that hand." Ryan leans down to whisper to me. I clench my jaw and slowly release my grip to move to his arm. I take a deep breath and pull on a confident look and stride as we make our way into the building. I can feel eyes on me and I immediately feel as if they recognize us. Without the face paint Ryan was completely different in looks. I never wore make-up and my hair was naturally wavy. I've never styled it for anything but Prom in high school. When I felt like people were whispering about me I began to sweat slightly, my arm shaking while hooked with Ryan's. I began to stumble a bit in my heels but thankfully Ryan would sturdy me each time. Once inside he pulled me to a corner to talk with me. "Come on, Diane, pull it together. Okay? You're very important to this mission and my life." I take a deep breath.

"I know. I just--" I pause. "--I just can't help but feel as if people are staring and talking bad about us."

"Of course they are staring, "He says with a huff, "Look at you. You're stunning. If anything they are either admiring you or are jealous of your beauty." As I stare up at the blue eyes that I fell for long ago I realized how much Ryan had really changed for me. He went from barely talking to me to standing here in this corner to only talk to me and make me feel like I am invincible. My heart grew with love for this man almost instantly and I smiled, nodding.

"Thank you." His lips press to my forehead softly before pulling back.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Then let's get this thing moving, shall we?" I nod again and follow him to the middle of the floor. Mica and Kerry had moved from person to person talking about us to different groups and couples. Soon enough the love for Ryan grew and people came left and right to try and befriend him or catch his attention. I heard whispers of me only using him for money and oh boy did I rock that rumor. I would ask him to get me an item and he'd wink at me each time before going and retrieving what I requested. He knew I was trying to play the part and that we were even in this heist.

"Hello, Mr. Wood!" Ryan spins at his code name and smiles at an older gentleman. "Ah, this must be your lovely girlfriend." He turns to look at me and before I can nod Ryan speaks up.

"Wife, actually." My heart fluttered harshly. No one asked how far along in our relationship we were so I never got to hear Ryan say it. We never discussed our placement either. It was a just roll with it kind of thing.

"Well you both sure scored lookers!" I smiled and nodded, letting my face clear from redness.

"I know I sure did." I comment.

"You're a very beautiful woman, Mrs. Wood." He says with a lean towards me. "He is very lucky to have you." I felt Ryan's fist enclose slightly around mine. I knew he was jealous because I did the same thing every time a women touched him or flirted towards him.

"Thank you, Mr..."

"Mr. Davidson!" The man says, filling in the blank Ryan had started for him. "I am the person running this auction tonight." Ryan nods and bows slightly.

"Well my pleasure to be here, Mr. Davidson." The older man begins to ramble on about the different items being auctioned but I knew very well that most of that wouldn't be sold tonight due to it being stolen by our crew.

"There's even going to be a later auction for the house itself!" The man finishes, smiling wide at his investment into Ryan's "fortune". I look to Ryan, whom all of a sudden really does seem interested. Maybe that was just his good acting skills or he actually was thinking of buying this overly-large place. As he looked around, though, he shook his head.

"I prefer smaller houses and not mansions." He says with a shrug. "I think mansions are too cocky." _So are you..._

"A lot agree." Mr. Davidson replies. "Now if you'll excuse me, there's an auction about to start!" He clears his throat and Ryan tenses slightly.

"Allow me to get us a drink before you start. To toast for happy fortune!" Mr. Davidson smiles and I almost feel sorry for the guy. Almost. That meaning the poison Ryan was planning to slip into this guy's drink wasn't meant to kill him. He'd be fine but he won't wake up for a few days and he won't remember the whole day it happened. Ryan retrieves the drinks and I watch with Ryan as we all take sips of our champagne. The drugs work within five to ten minutes depending on dosage levels. Seeing to how Ryan was only fixing one sleeve he didn't use all of it. Who else was he planning to drug? Mr. Davidson waves himself off as he goes towards the stage. Three paintings and a vase have been sold for extremely high prices for their actual worth before he suddenly faints with no stumbling or warning at all. The crowd panics and rushes as close as possible to the floor area he had fainted onto. He was out cold but still breathing.

"Come on." I whisper, pulling Ryan. He nods and we slip from the crowd, Caleb running through the crowd.

"I'm a nurse!" I hear him shout before we disappear behind the stairwell and into the back of the corridor that was lead behind it. My heels clack against the echoing flooring while Ryan was silent behind me.

"They should be waiting for us out back," I remind him. "If not this is going to be horribly worked out." His low chuckle comes from behind me.

"I have one more trick up my sleeve," He points out. "If needed I can use it."

"Well it won't work for a while so I hope you already have an idea on who you would use it on."

"I do."

"Good. But you won't have to." I peek my head out the door and see the Fake AH crew standing there by the truck we were loading the goods into. "They're here. Load up." I pull up my dress all the way to the top of my thigh. Ryan lets out a low hum and I roll my eyes, pulling my gun from my garter. I let my dress flow back down and take my shoes off by the door. Heels weren't hard to work in. They were just way too noisy. We head back towards the bottom of the stairwell where they were now placing the goods. There was only so much we could take before becoming suspicious. Ryan grabbed a few choice objects and I did the same, rushing back and forth between the items and the truck. They kept piling on items and finally, when the last painting and furniture accent is stolen, someone notices the stuff has all disappeared.

"Hey!" Someone shouts. I look over at the open door and shoot my gun, shattering the glass on it. There's screams and panic from the crowd, causing a heavy distraction. Ryan and I bolt for the door, items flopping around in our arms as we make it to the back door. I slip on my heels and run with him to the back of the truck and placing everything inside before climbing in the front with Gavin. The others had climbed in the back with the stolen goods. Gavin had swerved and went all over the road because he's Gavin and I about took the steering wheel from him a few times. Nonetheless, we made it to the buyer in good time. While the men unloaded the items in the back I rubbed my sore feet. Running in heels is way worse than standing in them. So imagine doing both for two hours. The door opens again but this time it's Ryan in the front with me. He seemed cheery and excited. I smiled big at him.

"Why are you so happy?" I question. He laughs and shrugs, starting the engine and driving off mannerly.

"It was a good take. We did good tonight." He glances at me with a softer side-smile on his face. "You did great." I blush and look out the window.

"Thanks for helping me tonight." I whisper. "It meant so much to me because I know how hard it is for you to say stuff like that to anyone." I glance at Ryan and see the car headlights blind him for a moment before he smiles again.

"With you, it's not hard." I laugh lowly.

"You know, I'd swear my life was a book or something with the kind of shit you say to me." He nods and turns to pull into the safe garage. "I mean, you tell me cute things people dream of hearing or people write about." He turns off the ignition and looks at me with a slight glint in his eye.

"That's because I'm trying hard to not lose you and I never know when my last moment with you may be." I swallow thickly, tears coming to my eyes. "Come on, let's make sure the guys are okay." I nod and get out of the cab. I follow Ryan to the back where Jack, Michael, Jeremy, Geoff, and Gavin all stood in a line, smiling big. I guess the take was good.

"You all are so cheery. How much was it?" I ask, smiling at their happiness.

"Eight Fifty." Geoff replies. I nod.

"So one twenty-one each? Not bad at all." I reply.

"Yeah but it was some of the stuff that was pretty good that we are happy about." Jeremy speaks up. I look at him in confusion. "They let us each keep something."

"Awe man I wanted something!" I say with a small pout. I look and see that Gavin and Michael are giggling at each other with smirks and Jack smiling with such happiness I hadn't seen since he married Caiti. "Wow you guys sure are happy about this... Haven't you ever had a take so big?"

"Oh yeah, we have. We've also had more to take from it." Geoff says. I was utterly confused now.

"Why are you guys so happy then?"

"Turn around." I furrow my brow at my brother's words and slowly do, seeing something low to the ground in front of me. I look down and notice it's Ryan. When I see that he was kneeling, I covered my mouth.

"What the shit- Ryan--"

"Diane, I love you. It's obvious as hell." He says, smiling with a shaking voice. I could see tiny sweat beads on the top of his forehead. The cool air whipped at my hair and I felt tears coming to my eyes. My heart was beating in my ears but I focused on Ryan's words. "Like I told you, I never want to lose you. I also don't know when my last moments are with you. I want to make sure I never do lose you and that I can imagine those last times with you. I want you to be able to do the same. I want to see my future with you and only you in it. The crime-duo running the world together. Of course, with the Fake AH Crew... But I want you to chose your destiny and I want it to be with me." His hand fumbles with the other and he smirks, revealing a black box that was covered with noticeable velvet. It looked a little worn out so I knew it was used. "I could probably afford something better, but I saw this and I just thought that you would want it. Whether it was now or in five more years." Did he get this five years ago? "I already asked Jack for permission when we were in the back of the truck. He gave me a solid yes. Now, I hope you can do the same. Diane Lucille Pattillo, will you marry me?" The box opens and reveals a beautiful opal ring. It had one solid opal in the center with two smaller ones on each side. They were encased with tiny diamonds, him knowing I disliked diamonds but would love their compatibility with opals. The air had left my lungs and I was finding it hard to breathe as I let out small ugly sobs.

"Yes you fucking moron!" I shout, pulling him to his feet only to tackle him into a hug. He nearly falls to the floor again and lets out a low relieved laugh. He removes the ring from the box and slips it on my finger. It was a little loose but it could easily be resized by Mica since she was a pro at that. I look back at the crew and wipe my tears.

"Damn, LP, didn't think you'd call him a moron." Geoff says with a wide grin. I go to them and push him slightly in the shoulder.

"Shut up."

"Come here." Jack says, bear-hugging me immediately. I laugh into his chest and he sighs, kissing the top of my head. "Mom and Dad would be so happy..." Good. Because I knew for god damn sure that as I looked at Ryan I was happy as could be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=213925764
> 
> That's the outfit!!


	4. Four

We were engaged. I kept staring at the ring around my finger that was now sized right.

"I'm surprised you even took that thing off for Mica to fix it." Lindsay says, little Oliver bouncing on her knee. He giggled and his voice shook from the movement. "I don't blame you for fighting to keep it on, though. It's beautiful."

"Mica only had it for twelve hours so it's fine." I say with a small laugh. "Besides, now it actually fits." She nods in agreement and pulls her son off her lap, placing him on the floor to waddle away to his toys.

"So it's been a week. Any plans yet?" I shake my head. "Oh come on, is it gonna be big or small?" I stare at her for a moment.

"You know we're criminals right?"

"Yeah, and?"

"We can't have a big fancy wedding. We will get arrested."

"Michael and I didn't."

"You had special friends helping you! After what all the Mob bosses pulled for my prison sentence I doubt they will help me out." She frowns slightly and nods in understanding. Then she smiles and perks her shoulders up.

"I know!" She shouts, standing from the table and rushing to the closet in the hallway. Oliver and I watched closely out of curiosity. When she returns with something in hand I realize exactly what it is. She slides over the black book to me.

"Lindsay, I can't take this."

"Anyone and everyone in that book owe us favors. Call every single one to see what they can get for you. We will make this work." I roll my eyes slightly but feel my heart warming up.

"I can't use your favors. What if you need them?"

"I have a kid and my husband is a badass." She says with light laughter. "I'm pretty sure I'll be fine without a few hundred favors."

"A few hundred?" I ask, astounded. "What the fuck did you do, sleep with them?"

"Only like two of them. Michael did four or five. I forget."

"How do you- you know what, never mind." I put my hands up in surrender before grabbing the black book. "I don't even want to get started in your wild relationship." She laughs lightly and I stand from the table to leave. "Thank you again, Lindsay..." I say with a sincere smile. She nods and wave her off before exiting the house.

-

"What the hell is this?" I shout, walking into my house on something I really shouldn't have seen. Ryan was being held forcefully to the ground by Jeremy, Geoff, and Michael. Jack was held by Gavin and another male I didn't recognize. "Who are you and why is Ryan on the ground?"

"I'm Dan-" the man gets out before Jack struggles against him and Gavin- "your body guard." I arch an eyebrow and place my jacket on the hook by the door.

"My what?" He was about to repeat himself but I held up a hand. "No, I heard you. Guys, get off of him." The three men don't move. "Now, dammit!" They quickly scramble off of Ryan and I stand between him and Jack as the two brits release him as well. "Why are you fighting and why am I in charge of an infant for a body guard?"

"We are fighting because I don't want you to go on this mission. The body guard is the effect to it." Ryan says bluntly. "And for once, Jack doesn't agree."

"We need her for this one, Ryan." Jack argues quickly. "Hell, I'd never let her go and you know that!"

"Before you guys go controlling my life let me have a say, yeah?" There's silence in the room. "Now, what is the job?"

"Suicide run." Geoff speaks up. "Crew needs their asses saved, but for a price. We give up one member for a limited time only and they let go the squad."

"And why can't I join in?"

"Because they choose who and with the rep you built for yourself and you being a female they would chose you over anyone else. Last thing we need is Haywood losing his shit and blowing the mission." I listened closely to Geoff as Ryan came to my side. "Kinda Fake isn't gonna let you go that easy, though. They already requested you but we said we lost connections. Hence why we have a body guard for precautions."

"So either way I'm royally fucked if I try to refuse staying put?" He nods. "Well shit. Do I have a damn choice?"

"If you want to come and you really believe you can do this then it's up to you. If I learned anything it is to not go against you often." I glanced over at Ryan. He had a nervous look on his face.

"Ryan..." He looks at me with shock.

"You can't seriously be thinking about this." He says, dumbfounded. "I thought you were smart about this stuff, D!"

"And what if they choose you?" I ask softly. I didn't want to start a fight. "It's easier on both sides if we give what was wanted in the first place." I turn away from him and back to the others. "How long do I have to decide?"

"Tonight at midnight is the official settlement email." I nod and look at Ryan. He knew the look I was giving him; I used it often when we needed to have a deep discussion. The men noticed it as well and showed themselves out immediately. Silence struck us for a moment or two.

"For the safety of you, the others, and myself, let me do this." I request lowly. He keeps his mouth shut. "If I help then who's to say they won't give in easily? I mean, what is gonna happen if I do or don't? Tell me."

"Kinda Fake may be a mediocre crew but they aren't stupid." He speaks up finally. "They have killed countless crew leaders to immediately clear out the field. We are afraid Geoff might get hurt but he seems more focused on you." I furrow my brow.

"Why on me?" He sighs heavily and rubs the bridge of his nose.

"He's gonna give the crew to you." My breath caught and I shook my head.

"I can't take on the crew." I say quickly. "I don't deserve it, either. You guys deserve to have it first. Plus I don't know the first thing about running a crew."

"That's what I told him but he's set on you being the new leader. After this he's done."

"Well this changes everything." I run a hand through my hair. Could I afford risking my life at this wager? I bit on my thumb nail and sighed lightly. "I'm gonna have to do it. It's only for a limited time. I could handle that... I mean, I did five years in prison I'll be okay with a skimpy crew for a small moment." Ryan walks to me with a small smile on his lips.

"You know, I'm pretty sure this is why he chose you." He had that soft grin but his eyes were full of sadness and worry.

"You have to swear not to come after me." I say quickly. His eyes flickered with mixed emotions but soon he nodded. I leaned up and kissed him gently. "Good. Now come on, we gotta tell Geoff my decision."

-

Geoff was pleased with my choice even though he was just as worried as everyone else. He smiled weakly as we arrived at the meet-up spot. Nine on the dot. The sun was just now warming us Los Santos as it peaked over the buildings.

"I would say it's not too late to back out but that's a lie." Geoff says with a light sigh. I glance over at him, Ryan and me sitting beside him on a bench. "You know the rules, right?"

"For the tenth time yes." I say with a small laugh. "Do whatever they say for three weeks. Don't give out any information that would betray anyone but enemies. If offered contact with anyone, refuse it. Lastly, do not retaliate." I say, knowing the list well. My voice was monotone and a bit anxious. A group of three men are passing us to catch my attention and one of them breaks off to come towards us. I stand and feel Ryan's hand enclose around my wrist for a moment. Before I can turn to look at him he let's go. He was trying to not make this hard but it was incredibly difficult for both of us. He may have been hard at explaining how he felt about things, but he wasn't made of stone. I didn't glance back as the member of the stolen crew passed me. I casually joined the two men walking while the man concluded himself with Ryan and Geoff. I didn't glance back not once, hoping this would be easier for all of us if I kept my eyes forwards. Once I saw the sick grins on their faces I knew I was wrong. I didn't want to do this. I couldn't do this. I had a fiancé and a crew to be with. Then again that is why I'm doing this. We closed in on a personalized Elgy and I was slammed into the back of the two seater, my knees to my chest and my spine crushed against the car frame. My head hit the roll cage and I knew it was gonna be a bitch of a ride. The two men climbed in and I stared at them patiently.

"Oh, little girl, we are gonna have so much fun." I kept my mouth shut knowing I had nothing to say. "Got nothing to say?" I quickly move my hand to my mouth and shake my head. "Aye, Mark, we got us a mute." Mark laughs from the drivers seat.

"Oh we will have her talking." My heart sunk and I knew I had to act like act mute to get act way with this.

-

I met the whole Kinda Fake crew and as I watched their habits I saw bits and pieces of Fake AH: video games, loyalty, food, pranks... I saw that with a lot of crews we were rivals with. Always made me wonder why we had those types of rivals. Sometimes they were ruined by the wrong loyalty. Tim, the passenger in the car with Mark that day, was the most Michael-like. He had rage, jokes, perverted jokes, and yet still respected a woman. Mark was a bit like both Jack and Geoff. He was ruthless and harsh but other times he was what was keeping this crew from killing each other. Greg was much like Gavin and Jeremy. Goofy as hell and always cracking jokes. Lastly was Colin. He was the quietest out of the group and I'm sure of it now that he has a darker side to him. Watching his video gaming techniques and then how quick he is in movements around the house with unwanted visitors made it and ware to me; Ryan does the same things. Over the two weeks I have been with these guys I haven't spoken. They would make jokes and I would silently laugh, because I have a sense of humor, but I never spoke. Greg was the usual one to make me laugh and he put it upon himself to make me talk. He hasn't succeeded but I have decided I'd give the poor guy a break on my last day here. That Monday morning, while we are waiting at the switch, I will tell them one thing. Then again, that idea might backfire and they might want to keep me longer. In all honesty, these guys are just a bunch of talk.

Ryan's POV

Two weeks she's already been gone. I can only imagine what types of horrible things they are doing to Diane and I can't handle it. I aimed my magnum at the person-shaped board and fired away. All the rounds were emptied into the head of it and my gun kept clicking for a tend moment before I realized I was lost in thought again.

"Fuck..." I mutter as I pull the gun down to my hip. I was completely unfocused without her. When she was in prison we at least attempted to get her out. With this situation we were just sitting here and waiting. I couldn't distract myself anymore. I needed to get back Diane. If I fail then I know she will be stuck with them for longer but that's only more motivation for me. I rushed inside and quietly into my room, not shutting the door all the way behind me. I work fast: I grab my duffel bag from under the bed and slap it onto the mattress. I fold up the foot of it and reveal my weaponry. Quietly and careful not to damage anything, I begin placing my guns and knives together in my duffel. I hear the door creak behind me and immediately turn with the magnum I held in my hand. Michael throws up his hands in surrender but doesn't have fear on his face.

"Whoa now..." He says with a light laugh. I don't lower the gun. "Are you going after her?" He questions while eyeing the guns in the bag. I don't respond. "Ryan-"

"Don't try to tell me I can't bec-"

"Go get her." His smile was small but it was sincere. I arch an eyebrow at him and scoff.

"I doubt that's what you were gonna say." He shrugs and I lower the gun to my side while turning back to the bag.

"You're right, it wasn't. But after seeing that you might shoot me to slow me down I know how serious this is." I sigh and gently toss the gun into the bag.

"She's gonna be my wife, Michael. Geoff just sold her practically for the stupid Screw Attack crew." I say angrily. "If they were such a worth risking crew they wouldn't have gotten caught but such a low level group." Michael comes over and quietly shuts the door behind him.

"You think I wouldn't want to do the same for Lindsay or Oliver?" He questions. I don't reply because I was unsure if he wanted one. "I would easily take so many bullets for them." He sits down beside the duffel as I close it and zip it. "I got something to show you. Geoff advised against it but I need to fuckin' show you." He digs his phone from his pocket and brings up a security camera app. "You really thought Geoff would let the future leader of the crew get caught and we'd have no eyes on the situatuon?" He turns his phone to face me completely. It reveals Diane and the four members of Kinda Fake sitting in one room. Diane wasn't hurt. She didn't speak or make any noise as she cooked and cleaned for them and they all sat around playing video games. "Geoff gave her a corner cam before she left. She installed it in the room she stays in." The camera showed the living room. They didn't even give her a bed? If they were wanting her to try and switch crews they were doing and terrible job at it. Suddenly, one of the members, Greg I believe, grabbed her ass. Diane spun, slapped him, and caused all the other members to stop. My fists clenched when Greg did it again. This time Diane didn't slap him. I was begging she wouldn't for her own safety.

"I gotta get her out."

"No, you wait one more week, Ryan." Michael was stern and he tried to take the phone away but I got the information on the camera before he did. When he walked away annoyed I grabbed my tablet from the bedside and downloaded the app. If I was gonna stay put I was gonna supervise.

 


	5. Five

Greg was the usually really horny one who would try to feel me up from time to time. With this being my last day, I had a plan to get back at him. I knew Ryan had the information to the camera by now. I told Michael to give it to him. I also knew Geoff would go against it highly in chance of Ryan coming for me. Either way, Ryan got it. He was seeing everything Greg was doing to me and I knew he was ready to kill him without even batting an eye.

"Hey, Doll," I hear Greg speak up on the couch. "Get me a glass of water, yeah?" I roll my eyes but nod, getting him a glass and bringing it over to him. I expected the usual grope of the ass so his hand on me was nothing new. But his hand slipped to be around my waist and tugging me onto his lap did catch me off guard. "Now let me just feel you on me..." I tensed at his words. Should I fight back? It's my last day and after I slapped him last time I got an extended stay by three days. I knew Ryan was watching and Greg definitely had what was coming to him. I tried to get up but Greg pulled me right back know down. "Oh come on, baby... No one is home."

"Please stop." I spoke for the first time and my voice was rough and groggy. I needed to clear it and speak more. With him, though, I won't. His hands grip tightly to my thighs and he pulls me onto my more.

"Oh so now you can talk?" He asks angrily. "Well now I wanna hear you moan." I shake my head. He knew this was my last day; He knew I'd want to fight back. "So either you stay for another whole week or you do as I say..." His low breath tickled my ear but I didn't shiver or move. He pushes me onto the couch and when I try to get up to fight him he grabs my arms and pins my down. He uses one arm to hold mine and settles his hips on my stomach. His other hand runs down my chest and cups each breast before he grins devilishly. "I bet that Vagabond sure does miss this..." He likes his lips and no I begin to whimper at the sight. I didn't want this. I couldn't fight back; I wanted Ryan. The door slams open and I gasp at the savior. It was the rest of Kinda Funny. They were panting and in deep panic.

"I'm busy here, Fellas!" Greg shouts angrily. "This better be important."

"Ramsay said times up. They got cameras in here!" Collin replies. Greg looks at me and rears back his hand.

"You sneaky bitch!" His open palm comes down fast and connects to my cheek. I don't make a noise when he gets off me. I am yanked to my feet with my cheek throbbing. Instead of crying I laugh. Greg looks at me in annoyance. "Why the fuck you laughing?"

"You're dead meat." I say tesingly. I was referring to Ryan but I referred to myself as well. I grabbed his wrist annoyance spun his arm behind him, bending it painfully to his back. The men reach for their guns but I yank Greg's from his belt and point it to each of their hands, firing the weapons from their grasps. "Take me to my crew now!" I yell while aiming at Greg's head. The crew glances at me like I was confusing them. "Did I fuckin stutter?" Mark is the first to lead us out of the house before the rest follow ahead of me. I push Greg into the car with me while Tim drives, Collin takes back seat with us, and Mark takes passenger. I release Greg from the back and buckle him before myself. I knew he'd try to take me on while I was so I butted him against the face when he tried. He let's out a grunt of pain, causing Mark to glance at us. "Eyes on the location, Fellas." I remind them. Tim drives off towards the meet-up area. I can see the guys all waiting, Ryan in the back so that they have time to catch him from coming after them. If the crew was watching the cameras then they'll know I took over. Tim pulls up and I get out of the car immediately, gun on Greg's head as Tim, Colin, and Mark get out. I lower the gun and shove Greg into the car while walking toward my group. I began to disassemble the weapon I had, leaving pieces of it as I walked away. The last thing I held was the firing pen before that dropped to the ground as well. I smiled at the crew as I walked up, nodding at Geoff. Ryan immediately takes me into his arms and inspects my face. His eyes flick to Greg without saying a word.

"We were told no harm would come to our teammate." Tim barks.

"Shut your trap." Jack argues. "That was voided when you did harm to ours." Ryan's grip around me tightened and I knew he was trying to decide if Greg was the one to kill first.

"Well now we have all we need thanks to your prized possession there." Greg says with laughter while rubbing his hurting arm. "Got all the info we need on all of you. Michael, Gavin, Jack, Geoff, Jeremy and... Vagabond never got cracked. But you all did." The men didn't turn to look at me. They kept their eyes on the crew. "And unless you let us have her obey us next time, the cops will find all of you in the blink of an eye." Geoff laughed lowly and walked slowly towards the small group. They all faltered in their expressions but attempted to control their fears.

"She doesn't even obey our orders. What makes you think she'll obey a pip-squeak like you?" Greg swallowed visibly and I watched Geoff turn around to glance at me. He beckoned me to them and I politely obeyed. He turns back to the men. "You see, LP here is gonna be the boss of this crew very soon." His arm slings over my shoulders lazily. "Which means you technically messed with the wrong person in the group. That also means-" Geoff quickly pulled out a pistol without anyone being able to even blink before he had it between Greg's eyes. His arm still hung loosely around me as he smirked. "-you fucked with me." Geoff cocks the gun and fires, but Greg doesn't fall to the ground. He stays standing with beads of sweat drenching his forehead. The chamber was empty Geoff laughed loudly and lowered the gun, leaning off of me. "It's not my job to kill you." The gun is placed back on his hip but it quickly is replaced by a knife going into my own hand. "It's hers." I smile wide and devilishly, gripping the knife tightly. Geoff walks away from me and back to the crew.

"Well..." I play with the knife between my fingertips casually. "Looks like you aren't the smartest after all, Greggy." I coo before placing the knife to his neck and makes a slicing noise with my tongue and teeth. He breathes heavily, causing the three men to come towards us but Greg stops them.

"Please," he begs, "we will do anything. Just don't hurt us." I arch an eyebrow and cross my arms, removing the knife from his neck.

"Tempting. What do you have to give me?" I question.

"Other than the information we gathered on you all?" He asks, voice shivering.

"If you were so sure you had dirt on us then you wouldn't be so fearful of me right now." I comment. He groans and sighs.

"Fine! We didn't have dirt... But we do have something you'd enjoy having." I stare at him, beckoning him on. "That crew, Screw Attack, they gave us all their contacts, clients, and bosses."

"So?"

"So it will expand your boundaries. We know you already have the Cock Bites."

"Cock Bites?"

"Rooster Teeth or whatever they called themselves before." I nod, knowing who they were describing now. "With their help you could get even farther. Screw Attack, Gang Attack, CowChop, FakeHaus..."

"What about you? Maybe we want you in our boundaries." I say simply.

"What?" I hear Jack yell. "They treated you wrong, LP!"

"I'm not talking to you, Jack, I'm talking to Greg." I say without looking at my brother. "Now, tell me. Would you be in our boundaries?" Greg looks to Tim, mark and Colin. All of them seemed on edge from the offer. Greg finally sighed and nodded.

"Alright, alright... What are the rules?"

"No stealing, cheating, kidnapping, blackmailing, or injuring fellow crews. Anything that is counted as a dispute must be settle or both crews, whether it is one's fault or the other, will not receive cuts on any jobs or any jobs at all in that favor." I tell him. "You will count Geoff or myself as your commanding officer. If you are working with another crew I will personally assign the commanding officer for that job. You disobey, you get hunted. You act out, you're hunted. Trust me, when the hunters come out there is no escape." I can see Greg eye Ryan as one of the hunters. "Do I make the rules clear?" There's a muttered choice and I arch an eyebrow. "I'm sorry, I can't hear you, Greg. Are my orders clear?" He nods and says his answer louder. "Good. I suggest you give me all the contact information via cell by midnight. I will talk to each crew personally. Thank you for your time and I can't say it was a pleasure doing business with you." I spin on my heels and walk towards the crew. Geoff is smiling wide and cackling slightly.

"Way to go, Kid." He says when I reach him. "I made a good choice." I smile wide and thank him before going with them to our separate vehicles.

-

"I love you." My ears perk up at Ryan's voice and I turn to him, shirt covering the front of my bra as I was about to put it on completely. I smile lightly at him.

"I love you, too." I whisper. He comes to me and places his slightly cold hands on my bare skin. I shiver at his touch and lean up, kissing him gently. He stops the kiss, though, and his hands grip tightly to my hips. I pull back with worry. "What's wrong?" He closes his eyes and shakes his head.

"I watched it." He says lowly. "I watched what Greg did to you. I don't understand how you would want to pair up with a man like that!" He raised his voice slightly. My cheek didn't hurt anymore but I did have bruises on my wrists from earlier. "Any other time you would murder anyone who did you wrong. What makes that ass-wipe so special?"

"Nothing makes him special. That man is awful and he hurt me, I know, but not as bad as I hurt him." He stares at me with slight confusion. "You act like he wanted me to overtake him. He saw me as vulnerable and weak. That built up his pride. I knew you would see the video. I told Michael to show you it. I also knew Geoff would argue against it. I knew you'd want to kill the bastard as soon as you saw him even look my way sexually. I led him on partially so that I could hurt him where it fucking hurt. I hit him in the thought process first. I let him believe I was weak until he hit me. Then I got him in the control center. I made his men listen to me. I made him lose command of his crew. Next, I made him lose his courage. He didn't stand up to Geoff or me as much as he planned. Last but not least, his pride. I dwindled him down to the point of cowering and crying at my feet. He practically begged me to let him live for a wider expansion of our borders. I knew he had the information we needed to do so. So I went for it." I finished my explanation and saw amusement and bewilderment in Ryan's big blue eyes.

"You are fucking amazing." He says breathlessly. I laugh lightly and nod with a small shrug.

"I suppose I am..." I say nonchalantly. He laughs lowly and kisses my forehead. I finish putting on my shirt when there's a knock at the door. Ryan sighs and doesn't bother replacing his shirt as he answers the door.

"What's up?"

"Geoff wants to speak with Diane." I recognized Jeremy's voice immediately. "He says it's training time."

"Really?" Ryan questions, annoyed. "She just got back!"

"And now he wants her to come train for being a leader. She has five minutes." Jeremy sounded on edge. This wasn't good if Lil J was on edge... Ryan shuts the door and I button my jeans while his stay unbuttoned.

"Can't believe him..." Ryan mutters.

"Oh come on, babe, he let us have return sex. Cut him some slack." He hums and comes to me, wrapping me close to him again.

"Five minutes is enough time-"

"No, Ryan."

"Why?" He whines with a big frown. "I want you..."

"You have me."

"You know what I mean."

"Ryan-" There's a loud knocking on the door. I groan and go to it. "I'm coming!" I open the door to see Geoff with his arms crossed, face heavy and tired. "Are you okay?" It's only been two hours since I came back. He couldn't have turned so much into a wreck that fast without a good reason.

"I told you to meet me in the office. Come now." I don't disobey at all and follow him. As we go down the hall he speaks to me. "The first job of being a crew leader is making sure to never send people to do your job for you." We pass Jeremy, who avoids Geoff's eyes. He hangs his head and walks away from both of us. "The second is making sure all your crew is in check." I knew he was talking about me now and I stop, crossing my arms.

"Alright, Geoff, what the fuck is up?" He stops and turns to face me. His hands runs through his hair and he groans in annoyance and frustration.

"Well since you asked so goddamn nicely, I don't know to be honest if I want to leave just yet, and god knows Griffon doesn't mind if I stay, but after seeing how you were with the crew today I realized how old I actually am now... I can't do this forever. You reminded me of myself when it was just Jack, me, and Michael. Before I broke away from CockBites with them and started this family of our own. All I've built up and I'm getting too old to run it." I listen carefully to Geoff's words. "I entrusted you into this because-" He pauses and sighs lightly. "Because I know that when you are married to Ryan you two will run this crew together. You both will make this group go higher than I ever got us."

"Geoff-"

"No, D, listen." He looks over my shoulder and down the hall. I glance over my shoulder and see Michael and Gavin fucking around with Ryan, irritating him. "Come on, let's go into the office." I nod in understanding and follow him into his office's room. "I'm gonna miss the hell out of this crew. I might be too old to run it efficiently but I will fight until I die for this family, retired or not. I want you to know that me handing you the keys to the car doesn't mean you can drive it off a cliff." I nod and he sits at his desk, pointing to a chair in front of it for myself. "I won't want to, but if I hear about anything bad enough for me to do it, I will kill you. Ryan will come after me most likely but if it comes down to it, I will have you killed to save what bit of this crew is left." I nodded in understanding.

"I'd do the same thing, sir."

"Which is another reason I chose you." He leans back in his chair. "I trust you with this crew and everything about it." The drawer on the top of his right side slides open and a manila folder is pulled from it, Geoff slapping it in front of me. "In that folder is every single thing you need to know about anything this crew does. I want you to study it and live by it. If you feel you can't handle it then you can't even look at the leader's chair." I nod and open the folder. The first page is Geoff. It explained him co-founding CockBites and then breaking away but still being in good views of each other.

"What if I can't handle it then, Geoff?" I ask, flipping the page just to seem to have an autobiography of everyone in my hands. "Who would you choose?"

"I would choose Jack since he has the most leadership skills. Then again, he won't protect as quickly as he should. Ryan would have been a choice but he would do suicide missions for the hell of it. Gavin is out of the question... Michael will favor Gavin. Jeremy hasn't been here long enough for the option." I flip through the folder and Geoff sighs heavily. "I'd say study that folder, go over it. You have any questions I'm always able to answer them at any time. Don't let anyone else have that folder." I nod and flip past Michael and Jack to see a character I didn't recognize.

"Who's this?" I had seen the man in a photo before but I didn't know who he was.

"That's Ray Narvaez Jr." He says with a sad tone. "He uh... He left the crew years ago. I keep his file for safety reasons."

"Left as in..."

"Left as in left. Any time anyone asks, though, he died." I nod my head and read through his paper.

"Wait-" I say, something catching my eye. "He had connections with-"

"Yep."

"But why?"

"We don't know but we never had a problem with him."

"Geoff... Just because you never had a problem doesn't mean you shouldn't question it."

"Then I would have had a problem with him." He was quick to defend this man and it was irritating me. "Look, Diane, he left. He's done with this crew. He works with another one, has a girl, and is content with how he is." He leans onto his desk and eyes me sternly. "You will not go after him and you will not question his connections."

"Geoff, this is serious!"

"He didn't betray me then and he won't betray me now."

But-"

"Dammit, Diane, I said no!" His fist slams onto the desk and I don't react to the loud and sudden sound. He sighs heavily and rubs his face. He stops and just leaves his head in his hands. "Maybe this was a mistake..." He mutters. I arch an eyebrow at him patiently. "I should just stay. No one is more fit to run this crew than me."

"Oh don't flatter yourself, Geoff..." I grumble in annoyance. He eyes me as if I should take back what I said but I don't. I just glare at him. "You're an old drunk who already knows he's getting too old for the job. You can't afford to risk your life at your age, you got a family... You're too close to this stranger and I think he needs a reevaluation." I cross my arms, closing the folder. "I'm going after Mr. Narvaez and I don't want to hear a peep of protest nor do I want to see my own fiancé or brother used against me to try and stop me. I will find him, I will question him, and I will not hesitate to take him out for real if needed. You got that?" He just stares at me, slightly dumbfounded. "If you warn this Ray guy then you too have been warned." I stand from my seat and go towards the door, satisfied with my decision. If Geoff wanted me to be the new leader then I was gonna be a protective one. He let this man in, let him stay for a while, and then is ready to protect him as if he never left. I stopped in my tracks and spun to Geoff. "Why would you lie down your life for this man?" I ask. He doesn't reply. "Ramsay." His eyes go to mine at the use of his last name.

"You wouldn't understand." I huff at his answer and leave the room completely, slamming the door behind me. Down the hall was Ryan and Jack talking lowly. When they looked up to me I completely ignored their glances and went straight into the armory.

"Diane." I didn't respond to Jack's call. I left the door open behind me and quickly began picking my protection weapons for this mission. "What's up?" I don't turn to face them but I do answer this time.

"I'm going after Ray Narvaez." My tone was strict and firm. I wasn't changing my mind on this.

"What did Ray do?" Ryan's voice cut through with a harsh and worried sense to it. I almost faltered in my train of thought but I kept it on track.

"That's what I'm gonna find out." I load up a .44 Magnum quickly before tucking it into my belt and throwing my jacket over it. I grab a five inch blade and tuck that into its leather pouch before stuffing it into my right boot. I grab a now loaded Berretta 3032 and tuck that into my bag.

"Ray never did anything to harm this crew, D." Now it was Michael's voice. I spin and look at them.

"I wasn't talking to you, Michael." I hiss. When I realize how rude I sounded I do not apologize. I push it away and get ready for a rage out. Instead, I got a heavy sigh.

"Fine. Whatever." Michael not yelling me was something different and I knew something was off. He huffs and walks out of the room with the simple shake of his head.

"What's with this Ray guy?" I ask, angered. "What makes him so special?"

"What have you got against him?" Jack seemed bothered by it now. I look down and bite my tongue harshly.

"He has connections to-" I stop myself and shake my head. "Never mind. It's not like you'd care." I walk past him and Ryan, pushing Jack's arm. He reaches out to grab me along with Ryan but I push their arms away and spin from their grasps. My heart raced and tears of frustration were coming to my eyes. "No! Just... I need to do this." My voice cracked and I felt weaker than ever right now. I was trying to be strong and show them there was a deeper purpose to this mission than just finding Ray. There was much more to it...

-

I have been sitting outside of Tina Dayton's apartment for an hour now. Ray went in there thirty minutes ago and hasn't come back out. Safe to say this was the right girl. No one knew I left since it was heist day. Geoff gave me paperwork to study up on but fuck that. If I didn't go after Ray now they would never let me leave. I had to do this. I had to at least get the information I needed. I unbuckled from my seat and got out of the car casually. I walked towards the apartment building and knocked on the door to Tina's. A man with Glasses and brown shaggy hair answers. I immediately push him into the apartment and he falls to the floor while I shut and lock the door behind me. My .44 is immediately pointed at Ray and he staggers to get to his feet.

"Whoa okay who the hell are you?" He asks, squinting at me and fixing his glasses. I grip tightly to the gun in my grip.

"It doesn't matter right now. Ray Narvaez Jr., I am a friend of Fake AH." I say with a bit of shake in my voice. I was so angry just looking at this man. It had to be him...

"Fake AH? Did I do something to break our bind?"

"No, but you did piss me off!" I yelled, tears coming to my eyes again. "Tell me who you know!"

"What? I don't-"

"Don't lie to me!" I point the gun closer to his face and he catches his breath. I can see him reach for the barrel but I quickly hit him off with the butt, causing him to stumble backwards. "Don't even think about it, Ryan taught me better!" I breathe out with slight amusement.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry- look. I don't know who exactly you're wanting. Tell me and maybe I can help, I promise! Just don't hurt Tina when she comes home, please!" He begs quickly. I shake my head.

"I would never hurt her. She isn't the problem. And I know shooting you is technically hurting her and goes against my rules but right now I don't care!" I sigh and lower the gun, putting my hand to my head. "What am I doing... I'm so angry!" I say, pointing the gun again. "How could you hide it from him, Ray? How could you hide it from my brother?"

"Ryan's your brother?" I furrow my brow and shake my head.

"Ew no, Ryan's my fiancé my brother is Jack." His body stops and his eyes widen, his hands going to his side as if I'm suddenly not a threat.

"Wait, Diane?" My hands falter with the gun and I narrow my eyes at him, slowly lowering the weapon. "Jack used to talk about you all the time. Wait, what did I hide from him?" I put away the gun, knowing it was making the situation unstable for myself. I bit my tongue with tears coming to my eyes again. Just the thought of it made me want to kill him. It probably wasn't him... It couldn't have been... But he had to of known! There's a sudden knock on the door and I turn to it, unlocking it and pointing to Ray. He nods and goes to it, opening it. "Jack? What are you-"

"Is she here?" There's a slight pause and Jack groans, pushing himself past Ray and looking at me behind the door. "Oh my god you are like a child!" He yells, Ray shutting the door. "Diane, we told you over and over not to go after him. Why are you doing this? What could possibly be so important to you that Ray knows?" I look at the Hispanic and sigh.

"Ray, could you please tell me if you know who Alex Robles is?" I ask quietly. It was almost as if I was trying to apologize as a child.

"Alex Robles? Yeah I knew him. I cut him off years back when he moved to Texas." I closed my eyes tightly and refused to look at Jack.

"And could you tell me what his profession was?"

"Sure. He was a hitman. He worked for most of the big crews back then but went on a murder spree in Texas and everyone dropped him like that." Ray snaps his fingers at the same time I open my eyes.

"Is there any way we can find him again?"

"Do you know what you're asking?" Jack asks, angry at me still. "I think you've done enough, Diane." He tries to drag me from the apartment but Ray stops us by standing between the door and us.

"Wait, Jack... I think I know why she hates me and this guy, Alex... And I have a good feeling you're gonna hate me, too." I straighten up at Ray's words as Jack freezes. "Alex like I said was a hitman all around. I said I lost contact when he moved to Texas. I meant while he lived in Texas. He uh... He killed good and innocent people. As a sick joke he sent all his clients a list of the people he killed and started offering his services again, which caused everyone to drop him. On that list was uh..."

"Fucking say it, Narvaez." I say, shaking and crying by this point. Tears were streaking my face quickly and I was having a difficult time fighting them back any longer. "Say it." Ray nods and avoids my eyes as he looks straight at Jack.

"Your dad was on that list." Jack's hand dropped from my wrist. I expected him to start swinging or yelling at Ray so I had to mentally and physically prepare myself. Instead he just sighed heavily.

"I know." My eyes widen and I back away from Jack.

"You knew?" I whisper. "But you- How did you- Why?" I felt so betrayed.

"It was already done, Diane! What was I supposed to do? Hunt him down?"

"Yes!" I stood by Ray and stared at Jack in disbelief. "How could you? You left mom to cry over our dad and you did nothing but say 'well it's already been done'? You left her to cry over him, you left her to think you didn't care, you left us-" I pause and clear my throat. "I- I mean you left... her." My voice turned quiet and I shook my head. "I'm sorry I came here, Ray. Thank you for your cooperation." I quickly avoided anymore conversation and headed straight to my car. Leaning against it was Ryan, his face full of worry and sorrow. I wanted to run and hug him until I realized it was a sympathetic look and not an annoyed one. "You knew?" I ask, glaring at him. He doesn't respond. He just slowly nods. "Get away from me. I don't want to see you even set foot in my house tonight."

"Babe-"

"Don't fucking 'Babe' me!" I scream, voice cracking. "I trusted you to understand me and to tell me everything I needed to know! I trusted you!" I shake my head and look at the apartment where Ray and Jack both stood staring at Ryan and I. "I can't believe you betrayed me like this... I thought we were a team!" I whimper while looking at my ring around my left finger. "When I accepted this it's because I thought we were a team..."

"And we are." He says sternly. "And you know what teammates do? We lie. Why? To keep the ones we are a team with from getting hurt." He was clearly scared of me taking off the ring, but I knew I was too mad to be thinking straight. "You act like you've never lied to me." His light chuckle honestly did lighten my mood slightly.

"When did he tell you?" I ask softly.

"On the way over here." He sighs gently. "He knew that could have been one of the reasons you were coming over here. Everyone on this crew saw that list. Even I did... We just thought you knew. Jack barely just told us today why to worry about you coming to Ray's." I nod in understanding. Ryan's arms suddenly go around me and I can't help but let out a small laugh.

"You know just when to hug me..." I whisper while accepting his arms around me.


	6. Six

Jack and I weren't on speaking terms right now. He's tried to apologize to me but I haven't been able to accept his words just yet. I invited Ray to work with us if he ever needed spare money and to my surprise he gladly agreed to the offer. Geoff was angry with me for going after Ray but I needed answers and I got them. Now I was just trying to track down Alex Robles. Ryan knew how important this situation was to me so he let me be when it came to my research. When I would go on for too long that I couldn't even focus and started reading aloud to try and fix that he would beckon me to bed or bring me food. Everyone else was on edge when Jack and I were in the same room for obvious reasons. I typed on my keyboard furiously as my lead got me a step closer to finding Alex.

"Come on, Diane." Gavin whines. "Come play games with us for a bit, yeah?"

"I can't," I say with my eyes never leaving the screen on my laptop. "I got a closer lead to the dude and I can't stop now. I got so much adrenaline."

"You've been looking for him ever since you talked to Ray three days back..." Michael comments.

"And?"

"And you need to give it a break, D." I ignore him. "Oh come on, you know you need one. Just step away for a sec and then you'll do even better after a break!" I give in with a heavy sigh, knowing he was right.

"Okay, whatever..." I walk over to the console and pick up the third controller that was beside the fourth one atop the shelf. I turn it on and sit between the men on the couch. "What game am I kicking your asses at now?"

"So cocky..." Gavin says lowly. I laugh and nod. "Anyways, it's-"

"Diane!" The door down the hallway slams open and I groan, throwing my head back.

"What now, Geoff?"

"Get your ass in here before I drag it in here!" I huff and toss the controller onto the cushion and stand, going down the hall. I enter the office and see Geoff covering his mouth with his tatted up right hand.

"What?"

"Your new best friend sent this file to me." He slams a printed out email onto the desk and slides it to me. I pull the paper up and look at the details.

_Geoff,_

_Got a new lead on Alex Robles. Here's the latest contact info I got from a crew mate. Let Diane know that I'm willing to hunt this S.O.B. down with her. Got a few buddies in Twitch who can help with transportation._

_BrownMan out._

I put the paper down and looked at Geoff.

"That Narvaez?" He nods and leans on the table.

"I can't have you running off for a mission alone with him since I know you'll try to kill him, so-"

"I don't want anyone else in the crew endangered in my own mission except Jack." I say simply. He raises an eyebrow and crosses his arms.

"You want your own brother in the crossfire?" He questions.

"My father was." My retaliation probably wasn't necessary but I felt like doing it.

"Alright, you're gonna have to explain something to me here; You always put it out as if your parents were deadbeat drunks."

"They were."

"So why so quick to defend them and get mad at Jack for leaving and knowing about his killer?" I bite my cheek and shake my head lightly.

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try me." He leans back in his chair and I sigh.

"Ever had a bad relationship with your parents but still heartbroken when you lose one? Technically, before Jack went 'bad' our family could have been the Nobel prize winner for best family ever. Then Jack went into the other side of life out of anger and wanting to break free. They disowned him and without Jack they felt their reputation crumbling around us. Jack hated them after that. That's because they disowned him but not me. They may have been deadbeat drunks but we still had love for our family. After Dad was killed and mom started blaming me..." I trailed, hoping he understood. He nods thankfully and shrugs.

"Alright, so when do you want me to contact Ray?"

"Tell him tomorrow night we will go to where the contact is and interrogate him/her." I stand from my chair and push it into the front of the desk. "Also tell him that no one else in the crew must know about Jack and I going anywhere." I arch an eyebrow at him to indicate that was also pointed towards himself. He nods and I smile lightly, leaving the room. I turn the corner and see Ryan leaning against the wall with a knife twirling between his thumb and two forefingers.

"So you going on a brother/sister get away?" He questions. I shrug and walk past him.

"You could call it that."

"I'm guessing it's a 'no Ryan' mission?" I sigh and go into our bedroom that we shared here.

"Yeah and I really don't want anyone else hearing about said get away."

"Alright, you have my silence." I arched an eyebrow and eyed Ryan suspiciously.

"Why are you oddly calm about this?" I ask. "Usually you'd fight to go with me." He shrugs slightly and puts his knife into the side of his boot where the sheath was hidden.

"I know you can handle yourself." He says casually. I wasn't fully convinced so I continued to stare at him. He rolls his eyes and sighs. "Fine, I was planning on sneaking after you guys..." He admits quietly. I point a finger at him accusingly.

"No, Ryan, you can't do that. I don't want you getting hurt in this family business trip." He hangs his head with slight shame. "I promise to call and let you know I'm okay after every time I could have died horribly." He frowns and sighs.

"Alright, fine..." I laugh lightly and lean up, kissing him on the nose. He grabs my shoulders and kisses me on the mouth gently, catching me off guard. I pull back and eye him.

"You're acting very loving today. Are you sure you're Ryan?" He furrows his eyebrows.

"What? I can't be loving?"

"You're a vicious gang member known for countless murders."

"You're a righteous gang member that is soon going to lead this vicious murderer." He points out. I nod, smiling.

"True..." I catch a glance of my ring and admire it for a moment. "I'm also going to marry that vicious murderer." He smiles and kisses my hand, rubbing my knuckles when he pulls away.

"I love you." He whispers. I smile gently and hug him around the torso while his arms went behind my neck.

"I love you, too." My voice was low as well but it was a bit louder than a whisper. "The wedding is in a week..." I remind him. "Have you chosen your Best Man?" He frowns and shakes his head.

"It's so hard to choose."

"I know, I have to choose between Caiti, Lindsay, Kat, or Meg..." I complain. "Let's just have all of them be our Best Man and Maid of Honor."

"Let's do that. So much easier."

"No choosing favorites."

"I think Jeremy should come as Rimmy Tim."

"No, they aren't the same person, remember?"

"Then he should invite him." I laugh lightly at Ryan's joke and nod.

"I'm not saying they are the same person, but it's kind of weird they are never in the same room together."

"Neither are me and Batman." I laugh loudly and roll my eyes.

"If you were Batman I think I'd know."

"But would you?" He asks with a different tone of voice. It was light and joking and I couldn't help but smile at the change. I was so happy to be marrying this man. My phone suddenly rings and I look at the I.D. It was an unknown caller and I motioned for Ryan to shut the door. With this life unknown callers meant business.

"LP."

"BrownMan." Ray's voice came through the phone and furrowed my brow.

"What's up?" I ask, confused. "Transport wasn't supposed to be until tomorrow night."

"I have bad news. You might wanna sit down for this." I glance at Ryan and put the phone on speaker.

"Vagabond is here and your on speaker. Let him know whatever it is, too." Ray sighs loudly and pauses.

"We have a name on that contact." He says. "Kathryn Phillips." I catch my breath in my throat and swallow thickly at the captured air.

"Mom..." I choke out. "She used her maiden name."

"But your mom is dead." Ryan says quietly.

"I know that, Ryan, I was at her funeral!" I shake my head. "Someone must be using her name for some sick reason."

"I check in on that, Diane." Ray's voice came through the speaker. "It's her... I got an I.D. and fingerprints."

"This can't be- I was there!"

"I'm having a member down in Texas check the grave. He knows a buddy where she's 'buried'." I nod and thank him, hanging up the phone. I sit down on the bed and put my head in my hands.

"It's my mom... Ryan, my mom had to of had him killed. She had to of. Why would she have his contact?" My phone goes off and I see picture texts from the number that just called me. I look at them and see a woman with brown hair that looked exactly like my mom, alive and well. She seemed different. She looked like royalty. My eyes widened and I stood, running from the room to towards my car. "I'll be right back!" I shout over my shoulder before slamming the door shut. I get into my vehicle and start it up, buckling quickly while spinning my wheels against the black pavement towards Jack and Caiti's house. I arrived within a minute at my speed. I slammed the door to my vehicle and knocked viciously on the door to the house. It took a moment but Jack finally opened the door.

"Diane?"

"Jack, I know I was mad at you but we have bigger problems." I began to explain everything that I could and watched Jack's face switch with different emotions and confusion. After I discussed it all, we were pretty much making amends by agreeing to end this however it's needed. That even means killing our own mom or sparing her.

"So what happens if she has connections like you think?" Caiti questions, taking a seat by Jack. I shrug and scratch the back of my neck.

"I guess cut the cords. That's probably a lot of cords by the looks of it."

"Let me see that picture." I nod and pull out my cell, opening the photo and handing the device to Jack. "Royalty stance, confident face... She hasn't had that look since I left."

"I think she wants power." I say as Jack hands the phone back to me. "When you left she lost it. The only way to regain that power was to start over; clean the slate." Jack nods in agreement. Caiti seemed on edge and I glanced to her. "Are you okay?"

"I'm just nervous, that's all..." She glances at Jack, who looks suddenly nervous also. My eyes widen and I look between them.

"Oh my god you're pregnant." I say quickly. I almost stumbled over my words in excitement. They nod together and I squeak, covering my mouth. "I'm gonna be an aunt!" I pause and put a hand through my hair. "Wait... So are you guys gonna do like Michael and Lindsay? Only major hits?" Jack sighs and shakes his head.

"I uh... I think I'm gonna try getting out." My heart dropped. "I know the only real way is death but I don't want the baby and Caiti being put in trouble or left alone without me to care for them." I nodded, seeing where he was coming from.

"I can't say the same for Ryan and myself when we get married." I reply. "Geoff said we could run the crew together. I want out, too, Jack. I have regrets for joining but then I go and regret nothing. Do you understand what I mean?" He nods and I sigh. "It shouldn't be this difficult to be happy." Jack glances at Caiti and I know he was thinking the same thing. I couldn't have Jack go on this mission. Especially with Caiti being pregnant and by herself if something does happen... "Jack, I'm letting you off the hook."

"Diane, don't do it just because-"

"My decision is final." I stand from the couch and put my phone into my back pocket. "I'll give you the details when the job is done. Watch out for that call." I don't let him respond or react by the time I am out the door and into my car.

-

Ray and I jumped out of the plane and pulled our black chutes, floating to the ground stealthily, balancing and pulling the handles to slow ourselves.

"You know how to fly these things?" I hear Ray ask through the earpiece. I laugh lowly and nod, clicking it to stay on.

"Being engaged to Vagabond makes you learn how to live life to the fullest."

"It's strange for you to say Vagabond and not Ryan..."

"Well ya never know who's listening, BrownMan." He laughs lowly as we land together on the solid ground.

"True." He and I both click off the earpiece to stop interruption and excessive noise. We both run forwards towards the small dimly lit home and I sneak to the side, scaling the wall the best I could. "Parkour." Ray comments into the earpiece. I try to hold in my cackle and focus on not falling. I make it to the roof quietly, careful of where I step. There was a chimney with a stack atop of it sealed tightly. "We going in Santa style?" I nod when I see he made it to the room without a sound made as well. I grab the silent power drill from the duffel bag Ray carried up, unscrewing the screws holding the stack down before quietly removing the item. I hook my utility grapple from my belt to the top of the chimney, peeking down to see no light. The only light was to the right of the house and we were on the left. My mom must be in a bedroom. I carefully and as quietly as I possibly can, shimmy down the chimney to the low fireplace. There was barely any ash but it was enough to make a soft landing. I could hear a television playing lowly int he lighten up room. I pull the cord to indicate it was safe for Ray to enter as well. I feel my rope go loose and catch and padded hook so it didn't make a thud noise on the floor. I hook it back to my belt and stay pressed against the wall until Ray came down and repeated the process I did myself. I point to the light under the door to the far front of us and he nods, sliding against the wall to avoid being seen if the door was to open. I follow his lead by sneaking around the other side. Ray tosses a gun at me that I thankfully catch and click the silencer I hooked to my belt to the front of the pistol. He did the same and did a sweep to the left side of us while I did the right. We finally made out way back to each other before going to the lightened room in front of us. I go to the kitchen slightly to the right of the room and grab a small knife, slipping it under the door enough to reflect the image of the room off of the steel. I could see a dresser and a foot of a bed with a body occupying it. I nodded and quietly placed the knife back in the holder before returning beside Ray. The mask I carried in my jacket was dislodged and I pulled it on, Ray doing the same with his Raccoon mask. I quietly and slowly turn the brass knob before barging in when it was fully open. I pointed the gun to the person laying on the bed, showing it was my one and only mother.

"Stay on the bed and put your hands up." I demand. "Kathryn Phillips, you are hunted by the Vagabonds for the murder of Aaron Pattillo." Her eyes widened and I smirked under the skull mask I wore. "Do you admit to these crimes?"

"I do not!"

"Do you admit to being a part of these crimes?"

"I-"

"Don't lie to us, Ms. Phillips!"

"I do!" She cries out. "I needed to do it! I had to! My life was ruined by him!"

"We didn't come hear to unlock a sob story, Ms. Phillips. We came here to do our job." I fired the silenced pistol into the woman's leg and Ray gagged her mouth with a sex gag ball. I didn't question his choice in gag because it worked. "You are to come back with us to the Vagabond hideout and-" There's a sudden shatter in glass and I feel a pain in my side.

"Vagabond One!" Ray shouts. He dives onto my mom and slams her to the floor, me gasping for air in pain.

"Get her-" I yell but am cut out by pain. "Get her out of here!" I needed her alive. I needed answers. I knew we were being watched. That's why I cut her explanation short. As soon as we landed I knew we were watched.

"But-"

"Go!" Ray follows orders and runs out of the room with her, another sniper shot firing off but missing by a hair. I crawl on the white carpet, blood leaking onto the clean fabric to stain it. I needed to get to my bag by the chimney. As soon as I made it out of the bedroom a pair of boots appeared in front of my face. I looked up weakly and saw a familiar grin.

"Thanks for the help." The man's fist collides to my face and I fall in pain, feeling my body fall heavily against the floor. My shirt is picked up by the collar and I feel the man dragging me across the floor as I panted, trying hard to not pass out from the pain I was enduring. As I coughed and felt warm liquid mixing with my saliva I knew I wasn't going to succeed. I'm tossed into a backseat, my mom sitting across from me as the man who assaulted me had sat next to her. She smiled, ball gag on her finger.

"Oh, Diane... Maybe you should try to kill me without working with someone I own." I glare at her and Ray as he avoided my eyes. He was in on this... The whole time he fucking played me. No- he wouldn't betray Fake AH like that. He couldn't. My brain automatically clicked to why he'd be "owned" by her.

"Why are you blackmailing him?" I question, grasping my side. "Tina is a nice girl. Why are you threatening them?"

"Because you threatened me, your own mother."

"You're supposed to be dead." I remind her.

"So are you and your awful brother." She sighs and shrugs. "Looks like you're just gonna have to enjoy the ride to your real death." Ray pulls out what I recognize as my cell phone and makes a call, sighing heavily when there's an answer.

"It's BrownMan." He says, getting slightly choked up. I didn't blame him. He had to work for my devil of a mother or else Tina dies. "She uh... She got out." He hangs his head and fiddles with the raccoon mask on his lap. "I'm sorry, Jack... She told me to call you to have you tell everyone. She said you were waiting on the call." I didn't make a noise to try and avoid jeopardizing any chance of survival Ray and I had. He hung up the phone and avoided my eyes.

"I'm not mad at you..." I whisper, trying to stop the blood spilling from my side by applying pressure. "I promise."

"Oh how touching..." My mother coos, scrunching up her face in disgust. "Yuck." I lay down flat against the seat and close my eyes, knowing I was fighting something I couldn't dodge. My eyes shut and I couldn't remember anything.


	7. Seven

I woke up with an itch in my side where I was shot. When I felt my body moving side to side I realized I was being carried. I looked down and saw it was the same shoes and pants Ray had worn.

"Ray?" I try to ask but I realize my mouth was covered. It wasn't cloth; It was a hand. I turn to look at the arm and see it was him. Narvaez was walking me quietly down a hallway to what looked like a nice mansion. That's when I realized this might be my mom's true house.

"Three minutes. That's all I can give you." He says lowly as I am pushed into the restroom that had a hard tile flooring in it. "See what you can do." He shuts the door behind me and I nod, noticing immediately there was no mirror and no windows. There was no glass, the curtains were attached with steel rings and was surprisingly heavy. This bathroom was escape proof. I looked at the floor and began tapping my shoe on the tiles, trying to find a loose one. I was twelve tiles in when I finally found a loose corner piece by the door. I pry it off the wood underneath and examine the halved piece. It was gonna have to do... I slipped the piece between my shoe and foot just in case they body checked me. By the way things ran I wouldn't doubt it. It was uncomfortable but the piece fit just barely and I had to walk a little different around the bathroom until I finally got the movements right. I took the spare time I had to inspect y itching wound. It was stitched and swollen. There was a loud banging on the door. "Hurry up in there, Pattillo!" Ray called out. I flushed the toilet soon after his words and walked towards the door where Ray waited with a gun in hand. "You done?" I nod simply. He grabs my mouth again and begins walking me down the hall again. We pass a few men, them not giving us a second glance as Ray lead me through the hall once more. We passed so many doors and I was curious as to what was behind them. We stopped in front of one and I was pushed into opening it gently. When I did I saw it was a room with two beds. On one was a woman around my age with black/brown hair and glasses. She was woozy and it looked like she was completely drugged. I tensed when I realized what place I was in. I was in a brothel. Ray's grip tightened on my arm when we entered the room. That's when I realized who it was on that bed.

"Tina?" I whisper. Ray relaxed and released me completely, not saying a word and leaving the room as quick as possible. "This is the blackmail she had?" I ask myself. I go towards Tina's bed and sit at the foot of it. "Can you hear me?" Her head weaved side to side and I sighed, running a hand through my hair. How do I help her? I look around and see there was a glass of water on the bedside that wasn't drank and then there was a cup with slight condensation next to Tina. That's it- they were drugging the water. I sighed and reach into my shoe, cutting at the ropes that held Tina's ankles with the sharp tile. Her wrists were free as of now but I had to cover her feet for when they returned. I placed the tile back into my shoe and shifted it back to the original place. I go to my bed and sit there, staring at Tina in fear for her health and Ray's love for her. They were drugging her and keeping her with me so Ray was forced to take care of both of us. The door opens and I look to see Ray has returned and is avoiding looking at Tina.

"Drink your water." He commands, pointing at my cup. I eye him and he shakes his head. "Drink it!" I groan and grab the cup, pouring all the water into my mouth but not swallowing. He nods and winks at me, walking out of the room once more. Was my mom running all of this? She had to of been. There were probably cameras in this room to make sure we stayed in place. I turned and curled onto the bed, acting like I was crying and letting the water drool slowly from my mouth. It helped with the camera since if they came and checked the bed it would be wet and they could check the camera for evidence. The beds weren't comfortable and smelled like shit. There were probably all types of diseases. I felt bad for every woman who had laid in this bed other than me. I felt bad for Tina. I didn't feel even the slightest bad for myself, though. I felt as though my way of life lead me to this path. Maybe I was too dark for marriage, family, love... I may have been meant for this. How long was I out anyways? How long was I here? It could have been days with how much blood that bullet caused me to lose. The door opened again and this time it wasn't Ray; It was a single different man. I sniffled and wiped at my nose, trying to make the crying believable.

"Stop your tears. We got an auction you need to get ready for." He says. My eyes widened but I didn't let them see. I was going to be sold? I curled closer into a ball, grabbing my feet and my under hand grabbing hold of the tile between my shoe and foot. I pull it out and wait for the man to touch me. I swing my arm out and stab the arm connected to the hand with the point of the tile. The man pulls back in pain and tries to reach for his gun but alas he fails. I kick his hand and grab the tile tightly, ramming the point into his jugular and covering his mouth. It was only a matter of time before someone looks at the camera to the room so I worked fast. I pulled Tina up from the bed and pulled her to the door with me. I swung it open, Ray across the hall with a gun in hand and arms in front of him.

"Let's go!" I whisper-shout to him. He nods and makes sure the hall is clear before he comes to help me with Tina. He begins to carry her bridal style to make the mission quicker. I grab the pistol he held and the other from his belt. The guns felt right in my hands as I fired at the guards and helpers my mother had chasing us down the halls. Men began to drop left and right until we made it to the escape hatch up the stairs and on the roof. There was a purple and white helicopter with a 'T' logo stamped on its side waiting on the roof with a silent rotor. This must be the crew Twitch. They ran most of northern San Andreas and Ray was apart of their group. I got into the opened door and grabbed Tina from Ray, laying her on the floor to the copter. As soon as Ray got in the pilot went up and avoided being seen. I look at Ray touching Tina's face and crying as he tried to get her to focus on him.

"Please, baby, please..." He whimpers out. "I love you. Tina, please focus on me. It's Ray. It's your BrownMan. Please be okay... I'm so sorry." He pulls her drugged body onto his lap and holds her close, playing with her hair as he gently rocked her body with his. It was honestly killing my heart to see this scene and I knew he didn't mean for anything to happen to Tina or even me but my mother was a cruel enough woman to have it happen. Suddenly there was a loud beeping from the helicopter's front.

"Missiles!" The pilot shouts, struggling to control the chopper as he dodged a missile. I groaned in annoyance and went to the emergency station near the front, opening the box and pulling out the flare gun in it. I loaded a flare and swung open the side door, holding steady to the safety bar and firing the flare. A missile followed it and blasted, shaking the cab and us. The pilot flew behind the mountain range as I continued to load and fire the flare gun to disarm the missiles from our chopper. I retook my seat and watched Ray as he didn't move from Tina. She looked as if she was sleeping calmly now, not aware of any change in her situation. I smiled lightly at the image, wishing she was never taken in the first place.

"Diane..." Ray's voice croaked after an hour of silence. I turn my attention to him, but he wasn't letting his eyes leave Tina. "Thank you for understanding." I smile lightly and nod, looking back out the window beside me. The city lights were bright tonight below us. We were flying over the border of San Andreas and Arizona now.

"It's okay, Ray. I had to trust you and that's all." I say with a calm tone.

"No, you don't get it- I played you for the safety of my girlfriend. I thought that maybe if I told you..."

"I'd back out. I know." I look at him once more and play with the ring on my left hand. "I probably would have done the same to anyone for Ryan." He sighs out of relaxation, scooting himself and Tina to the wall for him to lean against it.

"Hard to believe that man settled down with anyone." He says with a heavy laugh.

"Because he's crazy?" I ask with a slight grin. He shakes his head.

"Because he's never admitted he was in love." I nodded, believing it.

"Well here's a funny story: He admitted it because I was getting hurt from him not admitting it." I explain. "Burnie Burns was cutting me up until he admitted it."

"Really?" He seemed dumbfounded. "Burnie knew about Ryan's fear, though."

"Fear?" I question.

"Yeah..." He trails, wondering if I was just kidding on my confusion. When it was obvious I wasn't he continued. "He has a really bad fear of losing people because of how he feels. He thinks everything good in his life is just gonna lead to a tragedy and that's all; No happy ending." I look at the ring on my finger and spin it, thinking. Maybe that's what my fear is then... My eyes widened and I gasped.

"He thinks I'm dead!" I say with sudden panic. Ray nods and looks around the corner of the front plate to the helicopter cab to the pilot.

"You got a cell, dude?" The pilot fumbles around but finally hands Ray a cell phone. He throws me the device and I quickly dial up the only number I knew by heart.

"For the last time, quit calling this number! I'm not-"

"Jack, it's me!" There's a pause on the other line. "I'm alive. I'll explain whatever I can when I get there just be ready for me. Let everyone know I'll be home soon. We are almost there. I can see Sandy Shores."

"Diane..." After a quiet second he clears his throat. "Right. Alright, I'll see you at the airport." I nod and hang up the phone. I delete the number and toss it back to Ray. He hands the cell back to the pilot and I look at Tina on Ray's lap.

"She looks so peaceful..." I tell him. He sighs and nods.

"She usually does when she sleeps." He answers quietly to me. I furrow my eyebrows.

"How long were we in there?" I question.

"Tina was there for two weeks. You were there for one." I almost choked on my spit.

"A fucking week?"

"When we stitched you up they drugged you through the I.V." He explains. "They do it to every girl before they put them in rooms. I was forced to do it to Tina and you. Kathryn thought it was a sick joke or some shit. She's overrun with power... After they are in rooms they use water to keep them drugged. A little bit of this and that..." He trails to indicate the effect and I nod.

"So I've been 'dead' for a week?" Ray nods and I sigh while glancing out the window. I see Los Santos coming closer now. "I wonder what happened after you called them..."

"I don't imagine anything good." He puts his head back against the wall once more. "We have to move from that apartment now." He says in annoyance. "We were doing so well together... I promised her she wouldn't get hurt if we were together. She might leave me." I snap my attention to him when I hear the stress shaking his voice.

"No." I state simply. "Don't say that. She hasn't left you yet she won't leave you. Trust me... She might think about it but once that thinking is done she'll realize she can't leave you and she won't. She loves you. She trusts you. Do the same for her." He doesn't take his eyes off Tina as we close in on the airport. The pilot flies lower to avoid the attention and lands slowly towards the ground. I could see five cars outside and six men waiting by them. Gavin and Michael were leaning on one and all the others on their own. I took a deep breath and looked at my body, trying to find any indication that I was in a brothel. When it didn't seem like I ever was I waited patiently and nervously for the chopper to steady. Once it slowed down and shut off completely, Geoff and Jack came to the door first. Geoff pulled the door open wide and as soon as his eyes landed on Ray, Tina, and me he smiled and put a hand on his heart.

"Thought we lost all of you..." I shook my head and dove on the two, feeling like it's been a month since I've seen them. I pull back and see the relief in their eyes when Ray and Tina get out of the chopper as well. I don't take any time to find Ryan and run to him, leaping into his open arms and crying heavily into his chest. His arms were so tight around me it was hard to move, but right now I didn't want to.

"I thought you were dead. We all did." Ryan tells me, choking up audibly. I shake my head and hug tighter to him, not wanting to let go.

"I thought I was dead, too." I pull back slowly and wipe one eye while Ryan pulls my hair from my face and wipes my other eye.

"You look like you've been starving yourself." He says with a worried look. "What exactly happened this past week?" I sighed and knew that we were out of earshot from everyone.

"My mom runs a brothel..." I whisper.

"And what?" He asks, suddenly tense. "She put you in it?" I sigh and nod, closing my eyes. He pulls me to his chest again and sighs, gripping tightly to me. "I should have gone with you." He grumbles. I shake my head, pulling back once more.

"Let's not play the 'what if' game, okay?" I ask, sighing. He nods and releases me, the others coming to see me.

-

Tina and Ray were going to be staying with me until Tina was better again. Caleb was in charge of her health while Ray searched for an apartment here in San Andreas. He was looking into one down the road from the beach actually. I offered to help him find a place and he declined so I haven't been helping a lot with that but more with Tina. She was awake and aware of her surroundings but she had the biggest hangover type of feeling. I was sitting with her in their bedroom, flipping through a magazine Caleb brought for her to look at the pictures of.

"Hey, Diane?" Tina's voice cuts the silence and I glance up from the magazine. Her throat was groggy from not much speech and I was used to it since yesterday she started talking. She was laying on her side, facing me. Her glasses were slightly tilted on her face and she was covered with two comforters, sweating out the liquids they pumped into her.

"Yeah, Sweetheart?" I ask gently.

"Thanks for helping us." She has said thank you plenty of times before and I smiled and welcomed it every time. "Before you tell me it's no problem I want you to understand something..." She sits up slowly, closing her eyes in pain when she goes straight. I put down the magazine and focus on if she required my help. When it was evident she didn't I stayed cautious and listened to her. "I knew after three days that Ray was going to use you to get me free. I told him not to." She kept her voice low. "He went against me, thinking my life was more important than anyone's. I don't like that feeling... He was guessing someone else's worth compared to my own. Do you understand what I mean?" I nod and she sighs, continuing. "I love Ray a lot and I'm just scared that he's gonna give his life for me."

"Honey, let me tell you something about love in this life type." I sit up slightly more and clear my throat. "Ryan and I have sacrificed ourselves for each other plenty of times. It's just the type of loyalty we always saw fit in this relationship and life. You have to understand that just because Ray moved on to a self-employment crew doesn't mean he wasn't ever in Fake AH." She listens with a slight nod. "Because he was in this crew and grew up pretty much in it he will always see that as a sign of loyalty. He could be in a hundred self-employment crews and still sacrifice himself for you because that's what he sees fit. He will trick people for you. He will die for you. Those thoughts are things you'll be scared of, trust me. The first time Ryan got himself hurt for me I lost it. I went off.I thought he was the stupidest guy on this planet. That was until he did it again. And again. I finally realized it was his sign of loyalty and love for me. Much like how a dog or cat will bring you dead animals as gifts or toys when you're upset. It's to show they love you and care. That's a bad analogy I am aware of that, but it's all I had this is really on the spot." I say, laughing lightly with her. "Anyways, it wasn't until I started to return the gestures that this relationship built up to what it is. Ray loves you. When we were on that helicopter he was absolutely petrified that you might hate him when you came to."

"But I don't hate him. I want to stay with him." She clarifies quickly. "I'm just scared..."

"And I don't blame you one bit, Tina." She sighs and stands slowly from the bed, gripping the table for support. I stand and tend to lifting her to make her process easier. She gets to her feet and I help walk her to the door, her breathing focused and her eyes shut as she walked. When she finally opened them she squinted for just a moment and nodded.

"I can do it from here. Thank you." I let go of her but stayed close behind as she walked up behind Ray and rested on the archway of the hall. He was stood there with Ryan, talking about probably Tina when she spoke his name softly. His eyes snapped to her and his eyes fell soft with a uneasy grin on his face. He ran to her and engulfed Tina into a hug, not letting her go except to kiss her. Ryan eyed me from behind them and I smiled softly at him as the couple spoke quietly together. It was more of Ray checking on her than an actual conversation. Ryan goes around them and leans with me on the doorway to the room Tina and Ray shared.

"You know, the wedding was yesterday." He says casually. I laugh lightly and shrug.

"I'm a little bit late... Guess we have to reschedule." He chuckles and stares at me with a small smirk. "What?"

"If I didn't already I would propose to you all over again." I felt my cheeks and forehead heating up as I scrunched up my nose.

"You being cute throws me off, stop it." I state jokingly. He grabs me and kisses my forehead, holding me close to him.

"Well once we are married I'll stop being so cute, okay?"

"No, be cute. I like it."

"But you said it throws you off!"

"I didn't say I disliked it." I point out.

"True..."

"Checkmate, babe."

"Shut up." I snicker and lean up, placing a gentle kiss on the tip of his nose. "I love you." After what Ray told me about Ryan's fear I found those words even more meaningful than before. I smiled gently and stared him straight in the eyes, giving it all I had to say the words with as much love and care as he did to me.

"I love you, too." I hold him tight as his chin rests on my head.

"I chose my best man." He admits above me.

"Oh really?" I ask with slight surprise. "Who? Is it Michael?"

"Nope." He pops the 'p' at the end. "Ray." I arch and eyebrow and look at him, pulling back.

"Ray?"

"Hey, nothing can break the R and R connection." I snort a laugh and he pulls back, faking offense. "How dare you laugh at our team name! That was the golden age!" I roll my eyes and put my hands on my hips.

"I'm sure it was."

"It was!"

"Mmm-hmm." I hum. He pouts and I can't help but laugh. "I'm only teasing, Honey." I lean in and grab his hand, whispering into his ear. "Team Haywood is much better." He shivers under my touch and I can't help but smirk. When I pull back, I could see his blue eyes light up and stay dimly lit.

"I love that name." I laugh gently and kiss him on the nose once more before my lips fall to his mouth. God I love this man...


	8. Eight

What does it feel like when you walk in on your fiance being shot in the head during a heist? Well it sure doesn't feel great. I was fighting my brother and Jeremy to try and reach Ryan's corpse but they were stopping me without fail. In the head; There's no way he survived that. He couldn't have. I was screaming and crying as I was pulled over Jack's shoulder and he ran me out of the building, it collapsing as we ran from it. The dust clouded my vision and I was coughing, trying to protect my face but still see if there was a chance Ryan would pull himself from the ashes and come hug me. As we sped off in the AH mobile I came to the conclusion that it would indeed not happen.

"Diane..." Jack's voice was soft and the whole crew was tense. "I'm sorry."

"Don't." I say, covering my face and sniffling. I wipe the dust from my cheeks and eyes before looking straight at the floorboard. "Just don't." The rest of the vehicle was quiet but Geoff spoke up within seconds of my response.

"We get that you don't like emotional moments because neither do we but fuck, D, you just lost your fiance. We are trying to help you." I groan and look at Geoff, knuckles white as I clawed into my palms.

"You think I don't see that? You think I don't appreciate it?" I ask, yelling slightly. "You're right, I just lost my fiance but you guys also lost a brother. Maybe you should be trying to comfort each other before me." I put my head back in my hands and feel someone rubbing my back. I let them, allowing the soothing feeling to rinse over me slowly. The car wasn't as tense now that I was relaxing and I was beginning to feel calmer with the loss. All I wanted to do now was lay in my bed and be sad for a few days maybe a week. The car came to a halt and I looked up seeing we were at my house.

"I'll stop by later with Caiti and we can drink hot chocolate with the dogs alright?" Jack says, smiling lightly. I sigh and nod knowing being alone is a bad idea afterall.

"And we will come by tomorrow with Oliver." Michael inputs.

"Kat and I on Tuesday."

"Meg and I Wednesday- Wait, no... Wednesday is date night." Gavin reminds himself. "Thursday. Wednesday Geoff and Griffon can take." I laugh lightly and nod.

"Alright." I say with a small grin. "You guys are great..." My voice was almost a whisper but everyone heard it. I get out of the vehicle with a wave good-bye and walk towards my house. As soon as the door opened I felt cold and heavy. I was upset immediately. With Ryan here it was bright and warm. The feeling was light and fun... Now that he's- I stop my thoughts and start to occupy my mind. I begin cleaning up what I can around the living room and then the bar area connecting the room and the kitchen. I sweep on the tile and pile the trash in the corner while searching for the dust pan. I found it and finished off the sweeping while looking at the two completed rooms. It took about ten minutes but it did help me. I wanted to break. My body was aching and my eyes kept watering. Now would be a good time since no one was here with me... I sigh in defeat and walk to the couch, grabbing the throw blanket that still smelled of my perfume and Ryan's cologne. It helped the tears come to my eyes as I curled under it and laid on the couch. I wept heavily very quickly. My thoughts swarmed with memories and Ryan's face. It showed me how much he's done for me and how I should've said 'I love you' more. All those measly little worthless arguments and how many times I have ran out on him... I couldn't take any of them back. I couldn't tell him I love him one last time. I pulled the blanket above my head and whimpered as my eyes were shielded by my balled fists of fabric. I found a reason for me and I lost it. I changed who I was for this relationship and he's gone... Why did death have to be a big factor to our lives? Why was it real? I put so much trouble into Ryan's life and all he did was care for me and I was an asshole. Why was he with me? His life was so short- he could have found someone better... I sighed and uncovered my face, throat hurting from the ball of pain lodged inside it. I knew I looked at my cell phone on the table and sighed, reaching for it. I opened my contacts and went to Ryan's, tapping call and placing it to my ear. My eyes slammed shut when his voicemail echoed in the speaker.

_If you know who I am leave a message. If you don't, do not call me again._

I hung up and kept calling just to hear his voice over and over again. It was so nice in the beginning but got darker at the end. It was all of him right there in one little voicemail. I finally stopped, seeing I called him twenty-four times before I gave up. I kept hoping maybe he'd answer and tell me everything was alright and that it was just a flesh wound, sounding relieved that the shooter missed. I saw the blood, though. There was so much... Right in the side of the head. The body was going to be identified and it was going to be all over the news that a cop murdered my fiance, Ryan Haywood. Maybe this was my fault. It was my job to protect him and I let him turn the tables. He was scouting that room for me when I should have gone first... I hid my face halfway into the blanket again, thinking back to the moment he was killed. That smug bastard... He probably thinks he's the best cop in the word for taking down a venomous murderer. He must know his life's at stake by now. If not by the crew then by myself. I eyed the time on my phone and locked the screen, knowing Jack and Caiti were probably coming over soon. I better get decent... I stood from the couch and walked to the liquor cabinet. I sighed and pulled down the sky vodka before grabbing orange juice from the fridge. My whiskey glass was the only clan glass so I grabbed it, pouring the orange juice in before the vodka. I spike my juice and put the bottle back, placing three cubes of ice and stopping myself, staring at what I've just done. I gripped the glass tightly and sighed, not letting myself cry anymore. I watched the ice sink to the bottom and clink on the glass quietly. I downed the drink halfway with a harsh squint from the burn the alcohol was in charge of.

"Drinking?" I ask myself, imagining Ryan talking to me. "Do you really think that's wise right now?" I sighed and put the glass down, rubbing my temples. I was going to lose my mind at this rate. Walking back to the couch my phone begins to vibrate. I run to it, hoping it was Ryan for some reason. I frown when I see it's Caiti. "Hello?" I question.

"Hey sweetie," she greets, "we are on our way. You okay with that still?" I ponder on the question and give in, nodding.

"Yeah, it's fine."

"Alright, Hon. See you in five." I hang up the cell and toss it on the last cushion on the couch. I didn't need that in my hand at this rate. I had to prepare myself for guests. I had to be strong. If we talk about it, we talk about it. If not then we don't. I had to move past this one way or another. I looked over my shoulder at the glass on the counter, knowing I wasn't going to finish it with my train of thought. My legs curl under me and I fold the blanket around me like a wrap. It was chilly in the house and the lights were off. I should probably do something about that before they get here... I was trying so hard to lighten my mood before Caiti and Jack got here but I knew they would know I was crying. I don't like being miserable; It makes me even more miserable. There's a knock on the door and I go to it, pulling it open with a small smile when I see Thelma and Louise with Arthur running through the door like excited children. They nearly knock me over but Caiti reaches through the doorway and catches my arm.

"Woah, dogs!" Jack yells at them, laughing heavily. Caiti and I join his laugh and watch Thelma and Louise jump on the couch while Arthur sniffed around. The girls acted like they still lived here which was fucking amazing.

"Hey we brought hot chocolate and cake!" Caiti says excitedly. When I give her a confused look she shrugs. "I was really craving some fucking cake..." She whines. I giggle at her and roll my eyes.

"Come on in. I'll start the kettle for the hot chocolate." They follow me through the door and take a seat on the couch. Caiti folds my blanket I had still sprawled out on the couch and sets it on the arm of the couch next to her.

"Wanna play some games or something?" Jack asks, trying to find something to occupy me immediately. I nod and agree to the video games. He turns on the console and grabs three of the four controllers from the console's shelf. I set the water-filled kettle on the stove before turning the knob and leaving it to boil. I return to my seat whilst taking the third controller from Jack.

"I vote for Spelunky." Caiti says with a small excited grin.

"That's Team T.O.P.'s game, though." Jack tells her. I shake my head.

"We can play. I am tried of having to keep the game going by reviving Michael and Gavin all the time." I joke. They chuckle at that and I click on the game to allow the start-up. the music plays while little purple bats swarm past the man on the screen telling us to press start. As I choose a character I go to the purple pirate I unlocked until Jack and Caiti choose their characters.

"You got the only cute one!" Caiti complains. I laugh and shake my head.

"The little brunette is cute!"

"But she's wearing green. You're a crew member you should be the one wearing green. I want the purple one!" She was sounding like a little kid but she had a fair point. I rolled my eyes and deselected myself before going to the brunette woman and selecting her. Caiti was giddy that she got the pirate and finally started the game with Jack as the default character. As we played my brain wasn't working with the game. My hands and eyes were following all the game controls and I wasn't dying, but my brain was thinking of Ryan. It was reminding me of the death scene over and over until my vision got cloudy. I blinked to fix it but seconds later felt something hit my hand. I swatted at it and continued playing. My head kept thinking, though. It wouldn't stop and I couldn't help it. I finally died from being distracted and saw the game pause through my blurred vision.

"Daine." There's a voice that disrupts me and I snap my brain away from its thoughts as I just continued to stare at the television. "Diane?" I remember that someone had called my name in the first place and look over. Caiti was staring at me with worry and Jack with sadness. I looked down and realized I was crying and didn't even realize it. I sniffled and shook my head.

"I'm fine. Sorry." Jack places the controller on the coffee table and gets up, sandwiching me between him and Caiti.

"Let's talk it out, yeah?" He asks. I sigh and nod, putting the controller on the table as well.

"I miss him..." I whisper. "While I was alone I had time to think and I don't know if I'm gonna make it without him." Jack huffs and shakes his head.

"Man this is really hitting you harder than expected." He says lowly. "Look, we lost our best friend. We lost a brother, as you put it. We are all in pain. We actually do want to talk it out but yet we don't at the same time. We are here for each other but we feel like we're alone. I'm sure Ryan has told you that before." I nod and feel my lip quivering without meaning to. "If he of all people told you then you know we all feel the same."

"It's just unfair, ya know? We lost someone good to us but yet the state lost someone bad to them..."

"I didn't know Ryan that well." Caiti inputs. "We never really talked because he was always quiet and hard to hold a conversation with for me. From what he's done for everyone in this crew... I had and still have so much respect and loyalty for that man. Just because I didn't know him well doesn't mean I hate him. He's given his life nearly for everyone in this crew and Jack and you more times than once.When Ray was still around he risked himself to get Ray out of the crew and onto his own like he wanted when Geoff was forcing him to stay." I thought on her words for a moment and realized that Ryan did a lot more than he ever told me.

"That's true, yeah... And then Geoff threatened to kill him if he didn't agree with him. Ryan put the knife to his throat for him." Jack explains. I furrow my eyebrows.

"He's never told me any of this?"

"Well that's because he didn't think he deserved to be a hero in anyone's eyes; Especially yours." I frown and sigh.

"He was always a good guy in my eyes. Even in that rocky year our relationship was starting out. I shouldn't have made it so difficult for us to be together..."

"Don't start putting this on yourself, D." Caiti says softly. "Ryan loved you and all the way until today he was always seeing the best in you. You never did him any wrong in his eyes." I play with the hem of my shirt and nod in agreement. He almost always told be I was his good half.

"Want to hear other stories?" Jack questions. I quickly nod and he smiles lightly. "So when he first was introduced to the crew, we didn't take him seriously. He was just a guy that got into this life the wrong way."

"And how's that?" I ask, curious.

"He uh..." Jack laughs lightly with a glint of enjoyment in his eye. "He was a pretty happy tech guy and worked for different companies. Then when someone fucked him over and he lost a lot of good jobs with those said companies he sent out a hit. Well, the hitman didn't do a good job and just took the money and ran. That was all Ryan had to his name and so he decided he'd do it himself. He did it, too. Took out Mr. Vanhalen himself."

"You mean the guy who owned the FIB at the time?" Jack nods. "But he was like four states away how did he mess Ryan up?"

"He called his men here in this state and said it was Ryan who cut their cameras when he came for a tech check. After that Ryan was a wanted man. He was then known as The Vagabond: The wanderer." I smile at the story and curl my legs to my chest. I enjoyed hearing stories about Ryan like this. It was like we were cherishing him even though his death was so recent. People would say we were crazy or should be grieving but this was it- this was how we were grieving: Together.

"So what about the rest of you?" Caiti asks, curious now herself. Jack shrugged.

"All of us were pretty simple. After I moved here Geoff was my roommate along with Griffon. Back then we were still under CockBites' leadership. Geoff was getting sick of getting such little cuts when he made a quarter of that crew what it was and cut his losses, asking me to join him in the Fake AH crew. I accepted, tired of it also, and invited the dumb Brit and Jersey fuck that were new. They heard about low cuts changing to raises and top spots in such a small man crew that they were down for anything. Ryan came before Ray and then Jeremy after Ray left. Ray got in because Ryan needed a get away driver and Ray just so happened to be walking to his car at the time. When Ryan got away safe he offered Ray to be part of the crew without Geoff's permission. Ray for some damn reason accepted. Maybe his life was boring and normal, I don't know. Anyways, after Ray decided to leave for a better chance at life, Jeremy was sent to spy on us by CockBites. After he realized that we were literally doing nothing but enjoying ourselves he broke from CockBites and spied on them for us. He is the reason we got most of our jobs when we were broke as shit. He stole from CockBites for every job until he finally got bored and just stuck with us."

"Literally a rogue gone rogue." I say with a small laugh. The room goes silent with a warmer feeling than what there was in the beginning. "We need a good vacation after this." I mutter. Jack and Caiti both heard me nonetheless and agreed with nods of their heads. "Let's go to Greece."

"Why Greece out of everywhere you can go?" Jack questions. I furrow my brow at him.

"Because it's a beautiful place and is very underestimated with the culture type."

"Let's go to Rome or Paris then. Both are inexpensive compared to Greece and we have hideouts there." I sigh and give in, nodding.

"As long as it's not in Los Santos anymore it's fine by me."

-

They identified the body at the coroner's two days ago as James Ryan Haywood. It only confirmed for us that Ryan was officially dead and there was nothing we could do about it. I spun the ring around on my left hand and sighed, taking it off and placing it on my desk, staring at it. I wasn't counted as a widow but fuck it, I was going to say that's what I was. Ryan and I were close enough to our marriage being set it counted for me. Today was our trip to Paris. We were staying for two weeks and then coming back to this... Place. I put my hand on my suitcase handle and pulled it behind me, touching the doorway and stopping there, admiring the frame. Ryan leaned against it so many times before and I'm sure he would have leaned on it many times more if he could've. I felt as though I wasn't ever coming back. My mind wanted me never to but I knew this is where I belonged. Right now I just needed to run and hide until I collected myself. Everyone was going on this trip including Griffon, Meg, Lindsay, Oliver, Kat, and Caiti. All the couples got a room and I got my own for obvious reasons. The girls tried to pair girls with girls but I insisted on having my own room and didn't let them disagree with my decision. A horn honked outside for the second time and I took a deep breath before running back into my room for my ring and swiping it off the desk. I replaced the silver around my ring finger and rushed out my front door towards the car that Jack and Caiti waited for me in.

"Hey!" Caiti greeted with a big smile. "You excited?" I nod and push my suitcase into the backseat with me. Behind my seat were four other suitcases that I assumed were theirs.

"I've never been anywhere outside of the states." I tell her.

"Paris is beautiful." She replies with awe. "It's so cliché but it's that way for a reason. It's the city of lights and love. It's perfect for everything from a relaxing retreat to a romantic get away. Jack said they promised to avoid doing business while in Paris." I looked out the window as we drove towards the airport. They might have promised that but I didn't. If my mind got too uneasy I wasn't going to just sit around. "When we land there will be two buildings that are hideouts for the crew. There's a spare room in either one so you can chose what group to go with. Of course Team Lads and Team Gents will be separated like always, but you can-"

"I think I'm gonna give Oliver that spare room so I'll go with Gents." I say, cutting her off. I didn't mean to sound irritated but it was just how I was feeling at the moment. "Sorry if I'm snappy-"

"It's fine, Diane." Jack answers for Caiti and I don't look from the window. I was ready for this vacation to start already. We pull up to the airport where Geoff, Griffon, Kat, and Jeremy all are waiting for us and the others. I pull my suitcase from the backseat while Caiti and Jack grab their own from the seat behind mine.

"Hey, Nerd." Jeremy comments with a smirk. I smile small and nod at him a greeting.

"Sup." I look around. "Gavin late as usual?" I ask no one in particular.

"Probably what's holding them up." Geoff replies. It doesn't take but five more minutes before I see the familiar AH Mobile Michael was in charge of. Inside I saw Meg, Gavin, Lindsay, Oliver, and Michael. I waved them down and Michael turned into the lot, parking the vehicle beside Jack's, Geoff's, and Jeremy's. All of them step out, Lindsay carrying Oliver in her arms as she smiled our way.

"Hey guys!" Meg says excitedly. I hug her and Lindsay quickly before grabbing Oliver from Lindsay.

"Hey big boy!" I greet with a big smile. "You excited to go to Paris?"

"Mhm!" He hums. "What's Paris, D?" I laugh lightly and place him on the ground while he holds my spare hand.

"It's a whole other country!" I explain.

"What's a country?"

"Well... We are in a state and every country has many states. Ours is called America."

"Why?"

"Because our founding fathers called it that."

"You mean Daddy's daddy?"

"No-"

"Okay, Oli, that's enough." Lindsay says, laughing small at the conversation. "Come on, we gotta go on the plane." I give her a thankful look as she pulls Oliver away and walks towards the jet with the rest of the crew. I lag behind slightly, taking one last look at Los Santos. Maybe I wasn't coming back... Maybe my brain was warning me to not return here. Then again maybe not. Maybe I was meant to take a break for a moment and just... breathe. Without looking back again I stepped onto the plane and took my seat.


	9. Nine

It's been a week with us being in Paris. My mood has not shifted. I thought a vacation was what I needed when it was exactly the opposite. Everything reminded me of Ryan. I seemed like the only one who was hurting anymore. Everyone didn't want to leave the house the first day and then the second they forced themselves out and about. I did that as well but I immediately regretted stepping foot outside of the hideout. Currently everyone was letting me have my space for the day and out enjoying Paris. I stayed behind and cleaned up a bit before just laying in bed for most of my time. I fiddled with the corner of my pillow while staring at the cubes of ice sinking to the bottom of my scotch. I wasn't usually a scotch drinker but I was getting into all alcohol at this point... I know Ryan would have been disappointed in me but fuck, Ryan isn't hear anymore. There are stages to grief and this is one of them: anger. Over the week I have gotten past the shock, disbelief, denial, and bargaining. In fact, that last stage was what got me a day by myself to think. I skipped over guilt. I suppose that was my first stage truly... I was guilty that I wasn't able to save him. That it was my fault for him going in front of me in the first place. Looks like I have depression and hope/acceptance to look forward to. Hopefully I could accept this... I sighed and buried my face in my pillow. I could just kill myself. I've thought of it a lot and I convinced myself it was just my grief getting to me. I still had my friends and my brother. I still had myself. As I laid there with my face buried in my pillow I heard a drumming beat. I acknowledged it as a car passing by, but the beat stayed. I furrowed my brow and slowly lifted my head. I then realized it was coming from downstairs. I grabbed my blade that was tucked under the mattress and quietly crept down the stairs through my open door. I could hear the music more clearly as I reached the bottom of the stairs. It was Halsey's Garden. I looked around the area I could see and when I found no one I went to the stereo and shut off the music. It must have connected to someone's Bluetooth. I went back up the stairs but halfway up I heard the speaker power on again. When it came back on I spun and stared at it. Not My Type At All by Jacob Whitesides was blaring now. That's when I realized it was playing _my_ music. I ran to the speaker now with a pounding heart and yanked the plug, but the speaker was charged up and still playing without the wall being its power source. I was about the click off the power button when I realized something- someone had my phone. I dashed up the stairs again, panting and blade swinging by my hip. When I reached my room I saw a tall figure turned away from me by my bed, looking out the window. I didn't make a move as I tried to identify the person. I failed and finally gave in.

"Why and how are you in here?" He doesn't reply as the man pulls my phone from his jacket pocket and a new song plays loudly downstairs. It was Believer by Imagine Dragons. I slowly inched closer to the man with a higher sense altitude. I had to be prepared for any move this man made. The knife was tightened in my hand and I made it halfway to the man before my steps faltered and I heard the man humming to the song. I cocked my head to the side and listened better. He wasn't just humming but he was moving his head side to side slightly.

"I'm the one at the sail I'm the master of my sea..." He sang quietly. I couldn't make out the voice but it sounded familiar.

"If you're waiting for me to recognize you then sing louder." I say, half-joking. The man chuckles lowly and my heart skips. The laugh... He shrugs small and nods.

"All the hate that you won has turned your spirit into a dove." He sings louder and I shake, dropping my grip on the knife but not releasing it completely. "Last things last by the face of the fire and of the flames you're the face of my future, the blood in my veins." The knife finally dropped and I caught my breath in my throat.

"R-Ryan?" I whisper. The man completely turns to face me and I nearly crumble to the floor. I couldn't decide if I wanted to stay there in disbelief or run to the man I was engaged to. When it was obvious to him I was torn he opened his arms.

"Come here, Diane." His words were so soft and gentle and I ran to him, slamming my face into his chest. I don't cry because of my shock, but I do squeeze tight enough to cramp my fingers. I don't let go, though, and just stand there with his arms around me. When I finally was able to process what was happening I pulled back, slapping him hard across the face.

"What the fuck?" I yell, stepping back. "How could you scare us all like this?" He seemed stunned by my anger but I just crossed my arms and squinted at him. "We all felt your death, Ryan! We all mourned for you. I cried for you! I came to Paris for you!" I sighed heavily and ran a hand through my hair. "You know, I thought I'd love to see you waltz on in all fine and dandy saying it was all a really bad mess up but now that you've done it I want to kill you myself." He stays quiet and just listens to me. "I know you wanted to make us happy and just show up but this was a horrible timing moment and you really should have thought this through..."

"I did." He comments. "Sort of... Okay so the farthest I got was getting shot!"

"You planned that?" I bellowed. The music changed downstairs to a song I couldn't quite make out with the voices in my head pushing it away. "You couldn't have let us in on your fucking stunt?" I ask. He scratches the back of his neck with a slight blush in his cheeks. It was hard to be mad when he looked so cute and dumbfounded.

"I'm sorry, D. I really should have thought this through."

"Just what exactly is it that you wanted to think through?" My question was bitter but soft. "Did you think if you faked your death you could come and get me and we could break out of this life? Simple as that?" His eyes met mine and I sighed. "That only works in movies, Ryan. Those people don't have real connections. They don't have siblings in the life with them. They didn't stay in it for as long as we have."

"I just want you to be happy." He answers. "I thought maybe if you were out of the life you would be happy." I sighed heavily and felt my heart break slightly but then mend back together just as quick as it happened.

"Ryan..." I get closer to him once more and smile, leaning up and touching his face gently. At first he thought I was going to slap him again because he flinched and made me feel incredibly bad. I leaned up, kissing the cheek I slapped and then kissing him. "As long as I'm with you, whether I'm in the life or not, I'm happy." He smiles and kisses my forehead.

"You're corny as fuck." I shrug and nod.

"That's why you love me."

"That and many other reasons." I roll my eyes and laugh at him.

"Now who's the corny one?"

"Still you, loser."

"Nerd." We stand there for a moment just staring at each other with smiles plastered on our faces. God it's like this week didn't even happen. I felt at home with Ryan here. I felt normal. For the first time in forever, I felt normal and like any other human on this planet. Suddenly my thoughts are broken by thudding on the stairs and my open door showing Jack and Geoff."

"Hey, D-" Geoff stops himself and stares at Ryan and I holding each other in my bedroom. I clear my throat and back away from Ryan. He tenses up and pulls me closer to him.

"If you're here maybe they won't beat the shit out of me." He says loud enough for everyone to hear.

"Well, knowing Diane, she probably gave you an earful and slapped you at least once." Jack says nonchalantly with a slight out of breath voice. I knew he was trying to stop himself from running to Ryan and yanking him into a hug because that's not the "manly" think to do. Geoff looked like he was tired but yet so awake at the sight of Ryan. He didn't think like Jack did; Geoff didn't hesitate to decide he wanted to rip Ryan apart from me and into a hug of his own. I allowed him to, knowing it was unfair to keep him for myself. When he pulled back he smacked Ryan across the side of the head.

"You fuckin' moron!" He shouts with a furrowed brow and stress lines. "You had us all crying over you and poor Diane here was about to kill herself off." I couldn't deny it; I thought about the option. Ryan gave me a saddened look and sighed.

"I know... I'm sorry. I just thought that Diane would be happy if we both disappeared."

"And what about us, huh?" Jack asks. His tone was slightly irritated. "Do we mean nothing to you? Is my sister all you care about?"

"No, it's not like that!"

"Then what were you planning to do about us?" He stayed quiet. "You had no plan for us... You were gonna leave us to die?" Ryan shakes his head viciously.

"No I wasn't- look!" He slams a hand down in the air. "I was trying to make Diane happy but it didn't work out so I'm here now. No, I didn't have a plan for you guys but I wasn't leaving you to die!" His argument was strong and made all of us quiet. There's a sudden patter on the stairs.

"Hey guys, we're gonna-" Jeremy stops in his tracks. "Ryan?" He whispers at my door frame. After a quick welcome back and a little more explaining Ryan and I finally got some alone time again.

"You know, it's not too late..." Ryan's words were low and I eyed him.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not leaving." He frowns and sighs.

"I don't want to be Vagabond anymore, Diane. I want to be your husband. And I don't want you to have to be LP either..." He trails. "I want you to be my wife and I want us to be happy." I look softly at him and gently cup his face.

"I've told you before that I'm happy no matter what with you. And either way, both of us will always be Vagabond and LP. There's no forgetting that our lives happened. We could have a life that works out like Lindsay and Michael's. I would have the kids while you go out with the guys on missions and shit. Just come home safe, you shit." He frowns and shakes his head.

"I don't like that Michael and Lindsay are like that. I want us to have a solid at home relationship. Where I can go and be with you and our family at any time. I don't want to pledge my loyalty anymore to the crew if it means I have to be away from my family."

"But they are your family as well." I reason. "I love you, and I want you to be my family as well, but they are not something we can forget. I have an actual blood relative in this crew..." Ryan nods in understanding and kisses my forehead.

"I know... We can discuss this when the time nears. Right now, let's enjoy ourselves with each oth-" The door busts open to reveal a panting Michael and Gavin, whom immediately searched for the man who held me.

"There he fucking is!" Michael bellowed while the two ran at Ryan. I expected them to react like the others but instead Michael threw punches at Ryan as Gavin held him down. "You idiot! How could you do that to us!" I was going to yell at them to stop but Ryan looked like he knew he had it coming. As Gavin let him go and Michael stood there with reddened fists I covered my mouth and didn't say a word.

"Do you know what you've done to us, Ryan?" I have never seen Gavin so serious. It was rare to see him this way but this bypassed all those times I've seen him so serious before. "You fake your death and expected us to just move on? Are you serious?"

"You fucking moron!" Michael raged as Gavin hit him hard in the stomach and then elbowed him in the face. Ryan didn't try to fight back as he stood up straight again, catching his breath. Michael and Gavin were both red in the face and looked like they had tears in their eyes. When the room fell silent with just Ryan's heavy breathing, Michael and Gavin both pulled Ryan into a tight hug, openly crying on each of his shoulders. I was stunned as Ryan hugged them back. The only time I've ever seen Michael cry was when he thought he lost Lindsay a month in my time being with them. Gavin... Never. When they finally pulled back, they acted like other men and cleared their throats, pretending as if they weren't crying on another man's shoulders.

"You good?" Michael whispers to the brit. When he nods as an answers he waves their selves out of the room.

"What the fuck just happened?" I ask, still in shock. "Cause I've never seen Gavin cry, but Michael only once."

"I guess because they looked up to me more than they definitely should have they got hit the hardest." He sighs out. "Geoff always tries to see it coming. Jack, he is trying to be like Geoff on the whole death subject. Jeremy and I are good but we aren't as close as the others and myself." I nod in understanding now and grab onto his face, inspecting the damage the two children had done. "I deserved that I guess." I agreed, not going to lie to him, and went to the restroom to get a towel.


	10. Ten

I'm getting tired and older for sure. I'm annoyed by the idea of teenagers, I hate listening to newer music, and I hate newer cars. The only thing I don't seem to hate is Ryan. Well, and the crew, but even then I feel annoyance towards them. Home felt right as I slapped my body onto the old rickety bed. I let out a heavy breath as I heard Ryan drop our luggage by the bedroom door with a chuckle.

"I guess it feels good to be back?" He asks. I nod into the mattress and flip over to look at my fiancé.

"You know, I wouldn't mind living here for a few more years. This house is pretty hidden even though it's near the boardwalk." I mention. "I mean, would you like to stay with me those few years or did you plan somewhere else?" He looked taken aback as if we weren't gonna live together after we were married. I arched an eyebrow at him waiting on an answer.

"Well I uh, I guess we could stay here. I was thinking somewhere more on the outside of Los Santos."

"Oh, so like Sandy Shores?"

"Uh..." He pauses and sighs. "I mean outside of San Andreas." I frown and get up from the bed to go to him.

"Babe-"

"I know, you don't want to leave but hear me out. I talked to the crew about it- They want to go with us." I stare at him in disbelief of what I'm hearing. Everyone always fought to stay here. "Turns out they are about as done as you are. That trip to Paris? They were waiting on you to not want to come back. They were ready to move on, D." I pondered on my options for a moment.

"Where would we go?" He shrugs.

"We were all discussing it. Michael and Gavin and down for wherever. Geoff and Jack prefer the middle of the country somewhere. Jeremy doesn't mind anywhere as well as long as Kat comes. B-Team is down to come as well and even some of Cock Bites and our newest branches." I nod my head and am fond of the idea already.

"Okay... What about back to Texas? We can go to Austin, wait a few months, and then find something to do with ourselves." I suggest. Ryan smiles and nods, leaning down to kiss me before pulling back to still grin.

"I'm happy you're wanting to do this now. I was just waiting for you."

-

The crew and the others we dragged into the decision agreed on Austin, it being enough space for us to relax and enjoy the place. Also the money was like, non-existent when it came to prices. We were filthy rich in LS so I can only imagine what it's like in Texas.

"Ready?" I hear Lindsay ask from behind me. I spin to face her. She eyes me up and down and smiles wide. "God you look fucking beautiful." She says with little Oliver bouncing on her hip. I smile and thank her, looking down at my dress as well. It was a toe length beige dress that had like a boy's tank top sleeves. Little fabric butterflies and flowers of a brighter beige covered the entire top and trailed down the scatter on the see-through mesh covering the bottom fabric of the dress. My matching heels were hiding from the length of the dress. My hair was stiffly put up into a high bun with curls in my bangs and a diamond crested butterfly pin through the front of the bun.

"I'm ready to answer your question." I say, taking a deep breath. Lindsay waves me out of the room quickly to beckon me down the hallway to the walkway I was to go down with Jack.

"Are you nervous?" I shake my head after a quick thought to her question and shrug. "I was at first but I'm so sure that I want to do this that I don't feel nervous anymore." Lindsay smiles wide and nods.

"That's how I felt about Michael and me. I'm sure I've made the right choice as well." I make it to the door Jack stood by, whom was in awe over me for just a quick second.

"You look beautiful, Diane." He whispers. I smile wide and thank him the same as I did for Lindsay as I am passed to him, my arm interlocking in his as we walk down the tiny chapel's hallway that had all of our friends standing and sitting by, watching as we entered the room. Geoff tapped Ryan on the shoulder from his place as best man and caused him to spin to face me. His body froze and he let out a deep breath when he realized he was just staring. I felt blush in my cheeks from the flattering feeling it gave me before. As I made it to Ryan, Jack released me with a small hug and I handed my flowers to Lindsay, whom had rushed through the crowd to take her place as my Maid of Honor before I made it to the front. In the back by the door Michael held little Oliver, whom now held the rings on a pillow. I smiled at the sight and looked at Ryan. As the hired ordain started off his speech as the usual wedding would go, I stared at my soon to be husband. I wanted to kiss him already. I wanted to wear that damn ring and show everyone. I wanted to leave with him. I wanted to already make our lives forever together. I heard the mentioning of written vows and pulled out a piece of paper from Lindsay's hand as Ryan did the same with Geoff's. I was told to read mine first.

"Ryan, I am to follow wherever this takes me. When all isn't safe you'll be my safety... In a world of uncertainty you are my stone. You'll steady me and be my source of gravity. When my world's unraveling I know you'll never change. Everything you do for me is more than I can ask or know. You would give your life for me and I would do the same for you. When they say death do us part, I bet we can go farther than that." Tears were streaking my face no matter how hard I tried to stop them. "I love you. I always will. Everything we've been through made us stronger than ever. I'm ready to start my forever with you." Ryan stares at me, reaching up with one hand and wiping my face with his thumb. I knew he wanted to kiss me already as well but it wasn't that time yet. Now was his turn to read his vows.

"When I grow old, I won't need a reason to drink and smoke as long as you've stayed. The sun will come through and I will be so happy that I have finally settled down, but most of all with you when I see it shine on your face. In the wonder I will keep you close. You're the water to clench my throat. If I never let you go, I know you'll make me feel young forever and I won't ever have to grow old. But when I do, my weathered soul will always be young, my bluffs will be called, and you'll always tell me everything is okay." His eyes began to water with mine as the words reached my heart. "When my heart stops beating I know I will still love you with so much more than that dammed muscle. So all I have to ask of you now that I've asked the biggest question is... Are you ready to keep me young? Because I'm ready to always feel young." The Ordain quickly wrapped up to the I Do's thankfully and Ryan and I got our kiss. It was long and meaningful but nothing else came into our minds but each other. My life with him was just beginning.


End file.
